Swept up in the whirlwind of your cousin's wedding? Great, because it's not your wedding. So if he magically drops to one knee in the middle of someone else's big day, he's not just stealing another couple's thunder, he's stealing what would have been your day from you.
Tell him not to propose without a ring. Even if it's an onion ring. Tell him it means infinite love, jack ass. Tell him to get his woman a ring or else it will haunt her — ergo, her — forever.
When he's ready to pop the question, he doesn't need to do it in the company of a (surprise!!) parade with a marching band, a sword swallower, a lip dub, and a dance team. Flash mobs are questionably cute when viewed on Youtube — but think of all the failed, pathetic flash mobs that were too sad to upload.
It's not cool to propose while you're waiting at the deli counter unless you are willing to pay for both breakfast sandwiches.
This guy put it in his milk shake and she swallowed the damn thing. This woman ate it in a slice of cake. Thousands of other women had to pick through their dessert plate to find the diamond of their dreams coated in frosting, dusted in crumbs, and coated in whipped cream. How romantic.
Never fall for the "if we ever get out of here alive" proposal. I have, and when I did get out of there alive, I felt like a real chump.
You were shocked to find out you were pregnant — but that doesn't mean you need to be shocked by his sudden urge to propose. It's noble, I guess, but it's not right. He should put some effort into the propose, even if it that effort comes from an unexpected baby bump. Just because your birth control failed doesn't mean your engagement should.
It's never a good idea for him to propose because you had caught him cheating. It's an even worse idea for him to propose while you catch him cheating.
It's one thing to post the proposal on Facebook for your second cousins to like. It's another to become the subject of a social media proposal experience on Tumblr that culminates in a viral Youtube video. Even worse? This guy hired people to create one for him. (Spoiler: it's not even good.)
If he smells like puke, ring refute. If he's covered in spew, don't say "I do."
No one should ever get down on one knee if there's something enflamed and burning between their legs. They need to get that checked out, or wait for the swelling to go down.