Greetings, angry misogynists of the internet! Did you know that today is your lucky day? No, your female friends are not finally going to give you the sex that they owe you in return for being friends with them. But they are adding your beloved term “friend zone” to the Oxford English Dictionary, which is kind of the next best thing, right?
For its February 2013 update, the OED has followed its recent tradition of adding words popularized on the internet, like the recent “GIF,” or the newly added “tweetable” and “dumbphone,” and added “friend zone” to its lexicon. The only difference being, of course, that no one has ever wielded the term “dumbphone” to explain why someone is obligated to have sex with him even if she really doesn’t want to.
According to the OED, “friend zone” is defined like this:
a situation in which a platonic relationship exists between two people, one of whom has an undeclared romantic or sexual interest in the other:
I always wind up in the friend zone, watching them pursue other guys
While this definition sounds fairly broad and judgment-free, everyone knows that this term is employed most often by straight men who think their female friends owe them access to their vaginas in return for their sparkling presence. For many delusional “Nice Guys” (TM) out there, “friend zone” and its associated verb are a means of shifting responsibility for an unrequited crush off of the person with the feelings/boner and onto those manipulative bitches who are using their feminine wiles to scam friendship out of people. How dare they!
In the end, I think it’s just a tad disingenuous of the OED to validate this loaded term by putting it in the dictionary, especially when it’s hurt so many people. By which I mean, of course, the women who are made to feel like they’re not cool enough to have friends if they’re not banging said friends, not the assholes who complain about being “friend zoned.”