• Sat, Mar 23 2013

How To Respond To The Words ‘I Love You’ When You’re Not Ready Yet

smile-i-fucking-love-youAs we already covered this morning, love is grand in all its forms. Whether you’re in love with a human being or a My Little Pony cartoon named Twilight Sparkle, opening your heart up to someone and taking a risk, is gorgeous.

When it comes to love, there is no greater risk than saying the words out loud — especially if you’re the first to do so. You’re putting all your cards out on the table, as they say, exposing not just your hand, but a vein, and all in the hopes you won’t end up with a smashed heart on the floor. Saying I love you and not getting it said back has to be one of the most difficult things in the world.

But if you’re not ready to say it back, it’s not your fault. People don’t fall in love at the same speed, and sometimes it takes a little longer to get to the same place. It doesn’t mean it will never happen, it just means you’re not quite there yet.

So, how does one respond to the words “I love you,” when they’re not ready to say them back? Well, they talk about the weather, of course, because that’s what “mature” people do.

What We're Reading:
Share This Post:
  • Zanbrody

    In our early twenties, my best friend’s boyfriend said “I love you” to her for the first time and she responded by panic screaming while waving her arms in the air, then ran out of his apartment without saying any words and sprinted back to our apartment. She had always had commitment issues with guys, but it was like a total psychotic break and he was just left standing there confused.

    He ended up being a total jerk, so I still laugh really hard about it vs. feeling bad for him.

    • Amanda Chatel

      Haha! That’s awesome.

      My best friend told a guy just a few years ago whom she’d been seeing for almost a year that she loved him. His response was, and I kid you not: “Shut up. You don’t even know what love is if you think you’re in it.” He broke up with her 3 weeks later, and since then she has steered clear of all men. It’s really sad.

    • zanbrody

      Oh! Sadness. Wow. I hope she gets to the point where she starts specifying and staying away from that TYPE of guy vs. all of them. Though I feel like dating is sort of a land mine situation sometimes.

  • Breezy

    My husband told me he loved me on our first date, and I think I responded by telling him I was going to smother him with a pillow. And then I launched into this truly terrible metaphor about snow on a desert island, and him not knowing what love was and so he thought the snow was frosted flakes… Not my finest analogy. But it all worked out.