• Thu, Apr 4 2013

Why Do French Men Make The Best Lovers?

Brigitte Bardot and Serge Gainsbourg... being all French and stuff.

Brigitte Bardot and Serge Gainsbourg… being all French and stuff.

I hate the word “lover.” For me, it calls to mind the book covers of Harlequin romance novels, the really bad ones that only lonely housewives read, and can be found in overabundance at the grocery store. Proper books do not belong in grocery stores; proper stories of romance should not have a man with long blond hair flapping in the wind and rippling muscles kissing the neck of a woman wrapped in a sheet. In other words, great love stories don’t need such covers.

I also hate the phrase “make love.” It’s dreadful. I’m not sure if this has to do with my generation, but every time I hear the phrase, “I want to make love to you,” — and it’s been rare — I squeal and squirm like a worm that’s caught halfway under a shoe. I want to escape just as much as I wish someone would be put me out of my misery all together. I do not make love; I have sex. I fuck, I bone, I bang, and I make the beast with two backs if we were to get all Shakespearean about it. Basically, I’ve never had a lover and have never made love. That is the lesson to be learned.

I have had flings, boyfriends, friends with benefits and one-night stands. I have slept with American guys, Irish dudes, a Swedish fella, British chaps, that one darling in Barcelona and a handful of French men. I would never say I’m worldly in my sexual experiences, but I can say that of the men that I’ve known, it’s the French who have won me over in bed.

I can now, with a French “lover” (actually, he’s more than that at this point) and having “made love” without wishing I were a dying like a squished worm under a shoe, confirm the stereotype wholeheartedly that French men do make the best lovers. Or maybe I’ve just been lucky, and I’ve allowed the stereotypes to sway my thoughts on the topic. I am, after all, just some silly American in Paris, so all of this just might be bunk.

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  • http://twitter.com/globetrottertex Globetrotting Texan

    Cliché much?

    • Amanda Chatel

      Oh yeah! You got it! Hence the use of the word “stereotype!”

  • JennyWren

    I’m wondering if part of this is a cultural perception thing. I’m pretty sure that you can find selfish, boorish and insulting French men in the same quantities as any other nation, but I think there’s something in the way Americans perceive the French and the way the French perceive themselves that plays into this. Americans pride themselves on being assertive, independent and forthright; that’s their idea of masculinity. The French have a reputation for being cultured and sensuous, which I think they also enjoy to a certain extent. Can you imagine American men being encouraged to enjoy and rhapsodize about food, or poetry? But masculinity and sensitivity aren’t as incompatible to the French; they seem to enjoy their bodies more than Americans do, and aren’t as shamed by their physicality as many Americans. And let’s face it, happy, comfortable sex is good sex.

    • Amanda Chatel

      Perfectly said.

  • FR

    I think you can thank the French women for that. :) Sex is love if it’s done correctly.

    • Amanda Chatel

      Truth.

  • Jordan-Elaine

    Mmmm, this makes me remember that hot French guy I almost lost my virginity to while studying abroad—and now wish I had just boned him! (Who cares if he was two inches shorter than me?)

    Also, my least favorite euphemism for sex is ‘slept with.’ Come on now we’re all adults (I hope) it’s okay to say what your really doing in bed and it has nothing to do with sleep. I personally get a kick out of saying coitus though. Giggles. Great article!

  • Valentina

    Yeah well, you’ve been just lucky, I’ve been with some french and just one of them was awesome, and maybe just because he was quite a mature guy, had some experience, was a gentleman like no other. But actually, no way they’re the best. Best for me was argentinean actually, and I had them germans, spanish, americans, danish, british, lithuanians, swedish, italians, australians, whatever… latin guys are quite awesome at this, like not many french or anyone can.

    BUT, french guys are quite nice, although most of the ones I’ve met were quite shy – also because they were quite young. But we’re all quite young anyways.

    So, this article is not so accurate. Or maybe I was just lucky with argentinean men.

  • xyz

    i live in france and have slept with quite a few french men and most of them have been pretty disappointing to be honest. all but the guy i’m sleeping with now. he is greeeaaaat.

  • Fabiola

    I’m actually from Latin America and I have a French boyfriend…indeed he’s by far one of the best lovers i’ve had. Relationship and in bed!

  • Anonymous

    I am British, I have had sex with Black men, White European various, and an American. But I have to say French men did it for me. The attention to detail, grace, stamina, passion, simple niceties not normally recognised in other places required as a person, a woman, for a one night stand did I mention passion! The Italians are a very close second.

  • K

    I’m Polish and I’ve just had a French lover in my bed. It was sooo awsome: he did everything I really wanted and much more. At first I regreted that I had cheated on my fiancee but now I know that it was the best night in my life.