• Fri, Apr 12 2013

9 Robots I Would Have So Much Sex With

robot sex

I have some pretty terrible news you guys: only 9% of Americans would have sex with a robot. You wouldn’t fuck a robot? Fuck you. They have tons of feelings. They have many more feelings than people. Every movie proves that. Imagine how much knowing that only 9% of people would sleep with them hurts their massive robot feelings.

This is how we all end up dead, you guys. This is how they turn. Every movie also proves that.

I’m not like the others. I’d have sex with you, robot friends!

(Maybe I’m a weirdo but I want to be a weirdo who lives, not one the robots harvest for fuel.)

Picture via Dan Leyzberg / Yale University Supplied by WENN.com

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  • Lastango

    ‘Bots, eh? Now I’m conflicted. As a Replicant, biomech me feels hawt, but my not-sexy-enough naked ape wiring wants to go inhale a box of powdered-sugar donuts and hug a puppy.

  • Sean

    Marvin has the voice of Alan Rickman. Double win.

  • http://helloalle.com/ Alle

    NO DATA?! But he’s fully functional! And he’d probably write an unintentionally hilarious poem to you after.

    Also: when I saw the thumbnail of creepy Robin Williams Robot, it was cropped so that I thought it was a Cyberman. Cue horrified “OH GOD NO” reaction.

  • Fabel

    Johnny 5!

    • Sean

      Come to think of it, I agree with Fabel on this one.

  • http://www.facebook.com/sameurysm Samantha Escobar

    Bicentennial man would be SUCH a pity fuck, but I bet he’d be nice. And then stressfully attached.

  • Amanda Chatel

    Rick Deckard FTW always!

  • LaLa

    The real question is: would you have sex with HAL?

  • MR

    Did you skip over the one in the film ‘Lost in Space’, cause he had Will Robinson’s brain? :) Dr. Judy Robinson – maybe us guy will stick to the humans, huh? I thought that scene was badass, when robot was standing down the spacespiders though. Major West – yeah, danger close range is always a buzz.

  • squirrelbait

    you left out Geoff Peterson!