• Mon, Apr 22 - 1:00 pm ET

All You Care About Is a Large Penis

varys game of thrones

You think you care about looks or humor or personality or hygiene? This website, 7Orbetter.com has news for you, lady. You don’t care about any of that. You only care about a penis that is 7 inches or better. Their introduction explains:

Welcome to 7orbetter.com, the well endowed dating site and personals service that gives you what you really want. And what is it you really want? Looks, humor and intelligence are just an example of what initially draws us to another person. But if we are really truthful, there are other reasons. We are all attracted and drawn to size.

OH MY GOD THEY ARE ACTUALLY SAYING THAT EVERY OTHER QUALITY IS SECONDARY TO A LARGE PENIS.

Remember that scene in Titanic where the evildoer kind of menacingly hisses “They have marveled at her size!” And then Rose makes some kind of cutting comment and then the ship sinks? I feel like this is a similar situation. I feel like relationships based on this are going to sink.

the most common examples of greater size would be in reference to a woman’s breasts or a man’s manhood.

 

I am pretty sure that this is only the most common example of size in textbooks designed by Larry Flynt. I won’t even say Hugh Hefner, because you know I love Hugh Hefner (his involvement in the civil rights movement really got him out of a lot of jokes).

This dating site is dedicated to quality singles who appreciate quality well endowed men. We separate the men from the boys.

I’m sorry, I don’t mean to point out the obvious, but this is comically insulting to everyone, right? Men, women, eunuchs? Especailly eunuchs, I guess. Eunuchs really have a pretty hard lot in life.

Picture via Game of Thrones

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  • Eileen

    Do the women on this site have to meet a certain cup size? Or is it just a place for dudes to show off? Also…really, how can you prove your penis size? Post a picture next to a ruler? That’s ridiculous.

    • Lo McD

      LOL! I’m sorry but this whole thing just reminds me a of a guy I dated who claimed he had a 12 incher….it was under 7….

      Some people are ridiculous and you are absolutely right, there is little way to “prove” it other than through ruler vs. cock shots.

  • http://www.facebook.com/ekarma Robert Cunningham

    what’s next is that crimson cocks tumblr going to start a personals service.