There Are Men Who Stroke Women’s Genitals For The Purpose Of Helping Them Meditate

orgasmic-meditation

Once upon a time, the cure for hysteria was orgasm. Ye olde brain doctor would give female patients a diddle and presto, no more hysteria. (At least until tomorrow.) Now that the modern world has made pretty much all of us hysterical, it’s still common practice to use the sweet release of orgasm to achieve a sunnier outlook on life…and the people of the OneTaste Orgasmic Meditation community have taken that practice to a whole new level.

According to the OneTaste website, orgasmic meditation grew out of the idea that many modern humans (especially women) lead an orgasm deficient lifestyle: “Like Vitamin C, orgasm is a nutrient that has been missing from the standard human diet for centuries.” And orgasmic meditation is their way of fixing that, lest we should get scurvy of the soul.

To carry out this new agey spiritual practice, a woman lies on her back in a comfortable position and starts to meditate. Her designated stroker then fondles her clitoris for 15 minutes, helping her clear her mind and get her groove on…and then it’s over. So simple! So pure! So…awkward sounding! But if practitioners’ glowing faces (above) and testimonials are to be believed, it’s a clear road to transcendental bliss.

“My whole life I’d been going along thinking there was something wrong with me,” writes one satisfied woman. “That my pussy didn’t work right, that I wasn’t meant to get-off in sex; that I was resigned to pumping away, half dry, until my partner came…Then came OneTaste. With a new way of looking at things, they said, ‘What you experience in intimate connection with another human being is Orgasm. When you go into an involuntary state in your body, where you’re not constantly thinking or analyzying, and you’re simply feeling, you’re experiencing Orgasm.’” Long story short, she was able to stop stressing about climaxing for long enough to actually achieve it, and now she’s a happy camper.

But what do the men get out of it? Other than ultimate mastery of the clit, I mean? “What men get out of OMing is learning how a woman’s body feels and works and consequently, learning how a woman works,” one clit commander tells Cosmo. “Some guys come into class like, ‘When do I get mine?’ And that attitude is a prison. For most of my life, I thought if I could be a good enough giver, I could get something in return. And what I realized is that attitude robbed me of the actual pleasure I could feel in handling a woman’s body, especially her p*ssy. It’s like saying, ‘I’m touching velvet to make velvet feel good but I’m not gonna pay attention to the fact that velvet feels amazing to my hand.’” So basically, they gain mastery over the clit and become better people. Win win.

While the skeptic in me thinks that it would not be necessary for women to get fingered by strangers if they could just get their partners and/or themselves to focus more on those magical bundles of nerves poking out of their groins like so many cute little penises (without which an estimated two-thirds of women cannot climax), there is something sort of beautiful about this experience. I can totally see how doing OM with a man who is there purely for your pleasure could be freeing for someone who is cool with being masturbated by a stranger. And lest you think the men are just in it to touch hot ladies’ vulvas, here’s what the same guy had to say about that:

Some of the hottest OMs I’ve ever had have been with women who were so outside of my idea of someone I would date or sleep with it would blow your mind. We’re talking old, smelly, fat, you name it, all the things I’m not supposed to like as a super fit, foxy, 30-year-old guy. I’ve had some of the most heart-stoppingly awesome, super easy to enjoy, rock and roll OMs with these women. And that’s where I learn how to grow my heart.

Orgasmic meditation: bring us your tired, your poor, your smelly masses yearning to cum free.

(Via Cosmopolitan)

Photo: OneTaste

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    • Sean

      I agree with the quoted woman from OneTaste (seriously, that title) orgasm is impossible if you can’t relax, and that’s the case for too many people.

      And from a guy’s perspective, if you gained expertise and became skilled at it (honestly, who gets THAT much practice on a regular basis?), then that’s all you should really need. Hell, I’d put “achieved ultimate mastery of the clit” on my friggin’ resume, or on my wall next to my degree.

    • Billiesmith

      I do not know that what is happen in the thought of Man About woman ?

      http://www.prlog.org/12112705-6pm-coupon-codes-may-2013-75-off-entire-categories.html

    • notdatkindacoke

      The lady quoted may have been sleeping with the wrong men, if she wasn’t getting 15 minutes of attention sometime along the way. A quickie isn’t supposed to be the norm.

      • jack_sprat2

        Ask and ye shall receive. No man ever attained skill as a lover without a willing, eager, and INVOLVED partner. Listen to your body and conference in your guy. It isn’t a sin that he requires practice and feedback, explicit as well as implicit, to gain expertise. Don’t sit in judgment over either him or yourself. Instead, approach your time together as an opportunity, rather than a task. (That’s something that’s rather difficult to do when it feels as if you’re on the clock.)

    • sha_g

      Deepak Chopra is so full of crap, I am from South Asia and we laugh at him all the time and the foolish Americans who believe in his snake charm.

      • Mohabbat

        Deepak Chopra is a thief. He claims he is not a Hindu, but he makes a living selling Hindu Vedic texts, Tagore and Bhagvad Geeta. The man is a hypocrite.

      • sha_g

        hinduism had solid roots, but then time turned the vedas into fairy tales.

      • Mohabbat

        mindless comment..nothing can turn wisdom into fairy tales. fairy tales do form part of Hindu spirituality, which is fine. refreshing departure from the Abrahamic faiths selling fantasies as ‘facts’.

      • Heymr Paul

        Trust me my friend when I tell you that there are a lot of Americans who know the guy is full of shit. Here if you are lucky enough to get a celebrity endorsement, you can ride it to the bank (like Chopra obviously has). Not all Americans are so easy to fool as you might think.

      • sha_g

        oh i know, most Americans are plenty cunning themselves, in fact you are the most cunning on the planet, after all that’s how you got to control it for the most part, I was referring to ‘the’ foolish Americans who get fooled by him.

    • Fear fighter

      Great Article…I love women because without them there is no you or I… all Women should have the ability to feel and appreciate the health giving powers of orgasm…well except for women who suffer from a disorder that makes them have orgasm’s all the time…be nice for science to figure that one out…A beautiful woman in Florida took her life because of the condition…god bless her…on the real…orgasm make even the most uptight tool chill out and relax…life is hard folks…come harder….

      • tony martin

        All women are money, hungry vultures and are worthless

      • Ranger Dan Parsons

        Come on Tony, give it one more try. I’m sure your “soulmate” is out there somewhere.

      • jack_sprat2

        Look at it from the perspective of guys like him. Once the ex (or exes) have removed his financial wherewithal, whither goest thou? He’s tested your theory to destruction.

      • Silvia Squirre

        She’s into s and m with an emphasis on the m. Start looking.

      • wordaddict

        *yawn* Troll harder, Tony.

    • Tadatadum

      This seems like something I could really get into. ; )

    • M75462

      I can not believe that I linked to this story from Fox News. Somehow you guys have found my secret to success. I was going to trademark this on Legal Zoom

    • George_Tirebiter

      90% BS, 10% hyperbole. Other than a very small handful of people, this is just not happening. It’s a made up story. Not real. Imaginary. Fiction.

      • DB

        Have you ever tried this?

    • Alchemistfd

      I’ve been doing this or similar practice for more than 20 years. It’s really been a great experience for me, as a male. I am able to feel and ride along with their whole experience. My “preference” in women are those with whom I am highly empathic and can share ecstasy. It’s great to see OneTaste revealing this “secret”. OMing can change your life.

    • Ted666

      Men obtain the same service at massage parlors, though it is illegal.

    • Bill Henschel

      Alright, I’m retired, but I’ll take one of these jobs. I just hope I don’t rub anyone the wrong way.

      • Ranger Dan Parsons

        You don’t rub, you roll. That’s why they call it “rolling the bean”.

    • LOL

      Women go to places to get fingered by strangers all the time! They’re called BARS!

    • Derek Matsumaru

      Yeah I love the part where it says clitoral manipulation is not sex. I thought this was part of the ONION website.

    • Ronald Kapeller

      Do I just put my arm through a hole in the wall or what?

    • Ronald Kapeller

      Would it be frowned upon if I “accidentally” have an orgasm while performing my task?

    • Cathy Koch

      There are other men who will go down on you and lick your V until you cum as many times as you want. Those men are worth looking for.

    • disqus_Q53uRUQjEv

      If some one else is doing the rubbing, it’s not masturbation. Get it right.

    • Sean Stout

      Yeah, it STARTS with an M but I don’t think it is called meditation. Close though.

    • coolman

      i’m sure if you just go down on her and lick her slowly, she will orgasm.

    • girdyerloins

      What was that Monty Python film with the scene in which John Cleese is teaching the teenaged boys about sex and says, “Don’t stampede the clitoris!!”???
      Anyway, I must be lucky. Ever since my first contact with the alien species known as “de wimmen” here on Earth, I figured out that manipulating that little panic button ALWAYS produced a friendlier atmosphere.
      However, man-and woman-can’t alone by bread live, n’est pas? I’ve never met a woman yet who could survive on a steady diet of getting a clit massage. Women are made for cock and nature, as we all know, abhors a vacuum.

    • jack_sprat2

      So, when women (or men) massage men for money, it’s a crime. When it’s the women who pay for pleasure, it’s a ‘spiritual movement’. Pardon me, but what’s this nonsense that I keep hearing about a so-called ‘Patriarchy’?

      • wordaddict

        Read it again. These guys aren’t getting paid. It’s just like being a member (ahem) of a church, I guess, except this is what they do instead.

    • ms.priss

      well! my shine is getting down 2 the nitty gritty! .I will say i do not enjoy anyone other then myself ,i think women that have been molested,when children.Really,don’t want all that. Plus what do men get from that? Old perverts,! masturbating,is so personal,but freakin’ ain’t.

      • Steven P. Mitchell

        Huh?

    • Jeff

      If anyone said a guy was paying to be masturbated to orgasm, it would be called prostitution.

      • wordaddict

        Nowhere does the article say the men are getting paid.

    • bumsrush

      those kunts are too stupid to masturbate themselves.

    • CJS3

      So does this mean that women really don’t know how to masturbate?

    • peterike

      American women have totally lost their minds.