Chloë Sevigny Hates Your Stupid Coachella Denim Shorts

Chloe Sevigny hates denim shorts

Judgment.

We have a cautious relationship with denim shorts. On the one hand, they can look decent when you’re walking to the store and it’s laundry day, or you’re just hanging out in the park with some friends. On the other, there’s the multitude of shorts that aren’t really shorts; they’re just denim underwear (hi, Rihanna). As it turns out, one Chloë Sevigny can’t stand ‘em, and she has justified her reasoning for us all.

At a dinner party thrown by Barneys CEO Mark Lee to celebrate the reissuing of Proenza Schouler’s first collection, Sevigny said this:

“I’m struggling with [whether] I can still pull off things that I used to, you know, now that I’m approaching 40.

“You know, like, maybe it’s time to put away the cutoff jeans and things like that. I’m kind of in that window where I’m not sure if I can still dress like I used to, if I should be dressing more like a lady. I don’t know. When do you let go of your childish ways, as far as fashion is concerned? I’m not sure. I see older women dressing like kids and I’m like, do I look like that? I don’t know.”

While I find the phrase “dressing more like a lady” highly subjective and a little silly-sounding, I do understand the questions she’s asking herself. Even as a fairly young person, I still wonder sometimes which garments make me look like a teenager trying to play house.

She goes on:

“I was at Coachella this year and I kept calling them ‘denim underwear,’ because all the girls wear the denim underwear and it’s, like, a little obscene!

“I don’t want to say that, but you know, sometimes I think that they’re just too short. And now I’m turning into that person that I’m like, your shorts are too short!

As for her own jean shorts: “They’re kind of in reserve right now. They’re just away for the moment.”

Again, we have a cautious relationship with Coachella fashion. Well, no, we actually just think celebrities at Coachella dress like idiots 97.5% of the time, so by “cautious,” we mean “we’re desperately afraid we will somebody accidentally emulate that.”

Photo: Getty Images.

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