Yesterday, we reported on photographs of celebrity chef Nigella Lawson being choked by her art mogul husband Charles Saatchi at a trendy London restaurant. After he “her by the throat with first his left hand, then both hands,” Lawson exited the establishment in tears. Today, Saatchi is defending his actions with an implausible, rather incredulous explanation.
“About a week ago, we were sitting outside a restaurant having an intense debate about the children, and I held Nigella’s neck repeatedly while attempting to emphasize my point.
“There was no grip, it was a playful tiff. The pictures are horrific but give a far more drastic and violent impression of what took place.
If it looks like a duck and chokes other human beings like a duck, it’s probably a domestically violent duck. Oh, and if it was such a “playful tiff,” why was she crying?
“Nigella’s tears were because we both hate arguing, not because she had been hurt. We had made up by the time we were home. The paparazzi were congregated outside our house after the story broke yesterday morning, so I told Nigella to take the kids off till the dust settled.”
Yes, the media gathered outside your home because they wanted to know why on earth a man would publicly choke his wife to the point where she leaves in tears? Sorry, but I’ve argued plenty of times with people — if they put their hands around my neck during an argument, it’s no longer “playful.” It’s abusive. Fortunately, Scotland Yard reports it is indeed investigating the incident.
Look, I don’t know exactly what happened that day. Obviously, nobody knows exactly what happened who isn’t either Lawson or Saatchi. But those photos — they’re incredibly disturbing, and the expression on Lawson’s face is not one of playfulness, nor do they appear to be a joke of any kind.