• Mon, Jul 8 - 8:30 am ET

Charles Saatchi Divorcing Nigella Lawson Because She Didn’t Defend Choking Pictures

Charles Saatchi divorcing Nigella Lawson

In today’s “wait, WTF?” news, Charles Saatchi is divorcing celebrity chef Nigella Lawson because she didn’t make sure the whole wide world knew that he totally, absolutely, positively is not abusive by making a public statement about how he put his hands around her throat at a restaurant.

Recently, Saatchi insisted that the photographs simply looked “horrific” (they do) but that in reality, it was all just part of a “playful tiff.” Keep in mind, when Lawson left the restaurant, she was in tears — an expression of decidedly non-playful emotion — and that she took her children and left their home after the story broke. Now, Saatchi is divorcing Lawson; sound playful still?

In a statement to the Daily Mail (because of course), Saatchi explains that he is ending their marriage because things haven’t been all that great since everyone found out he may be a terribly abusive husband:

“I feel that I have clearly been a disappointment to Nigella during the last year or so, and I am disappointed that she was advised to make no public comment to explain that I abhor violence of any kind against women, and have never abused her physically in any way.”

Ah, so because she didn’t defend Saatchi’s “playful” behavior to other people by making a  statement to the press, she’s a disappointment now?

“I am sorry that we had a row. I am sorry she was upset. I am even more sorry that this is the end of our marriage.”

I can’t decide if Saatchi’s PR people are complete idiots or if he’s just ignoring them, but isn’t it a little strange that he can’t decide whether this was a “playful tiff,” an “intense debate,” a “row” or just her being upset? Regardless, I personally am simultaneously breathing a sigh of relief and one of frustration — the first because I know at least Lawson will be away from this man, the latter because I know that very little has been done to penalize him for his actions.

As a (much, much more pleasant yet very irrelevant) side note: Isn’t Nigella Lawson’s complexion exceptional? She looks how I always imagined Snow White would IRL.

Photo: Getty Images

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  • Sean

    Sam, you’re an expert…is her complexion really that good, or is it a really good foundation?

    • http://helloalle.com/ Alle

      She has very nice, even skin and also fantastic foundation + powder. It’s probably heavier than anything most people would wear IRL, because to look like that in pictures–ie, that you have amazing, perfect, Snow White-ish skin–you have to be wearing a buttload of makeup. Cameras are weird.

  • anna

    She is my skin idol. Is that odd? She has my skin if I get a shade tanner and can get rid of all the bumps and blemishes that plague us mortals.