Your childhood longing for Eeyore was accurate. Happy people make terrible romantic partners. Or maybe I am just being willfully pessimistic with that statement. In any event, The Daily Mail claims:
They say that people who are generally optimistic in life won’t experience problems but those who are extremely optimistic about their relationships in particular may develop poor coping responses when things go wrong.
Their studies showed that spouses higher in general dispositional optimism reported engaging in more positive problem-solving behaviors when faced with relationship conflict. These people displayed more constructive problem-solving and experienced fewer declines in marital well-being during the first year of their marriage.
However, those who focused their optimism solely on their relationships weren’t as good at constructive problem-solving when they experienced conflict with their partner.
These people also experienced steeper declines in marital well-being over time.
So, people who are optimistic that their partner will bring home flowers for no reason are going to be sorely disappointed when they do not. Meanwhile, people who expect their partner will probably become an arsonist are going to be happy every day their partner does not set the house ablaze. That makes sense.
I’m going to try to assume that all of my romantic partners are escaped convicts, recently on the run from the law. Whenever they manage to hold down a job or live in the same state for more than a month at a time, I am going to whisper to them, “they’ll never catch you now.” In conclusion, all my relationships are going to be so weird.
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