Famous Virgins Wed Bed Dead: Just Because Jon Snow Is Good At “Tongue Stuff” Doesn’t Mean We Want To F*ck Him

Hello there, Gloss fans! Welcome to this week’s episode of our web series Wed Bed Dead, in which editors Jennifer Wright and Ashley Cardiff must decide the potentially very sexy fate of three chosen gentlemen (and occasionally ladies) (and, uh, animals). The show is a live action spin-off of their longrunning and delightful games of Fuck Marry Kill here on The Gloss.

This week, in honor of my new book Night Terrors, we’re playing a fraught game of WBD with three famous virgins. Not that the book is really about virginity (or losing it) but it is about sex and anxiety so it seemed like pretty appropriate territory. We’ll be playing with Sir Isaac Newton, king of science, Britney Spears, onetime Princess of Pop, and Game of ThronesJon Snow, master of the “tongue stuff.”

Tune in every Wednesday at 1:00 for new episodes of Wed Bed Dead. And don’t forget to subscribe to our YouTube channel.

Seriously. Don’t forget.

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    • http://helloalle.com/ Alle

      I mean…Sir Isaac Newton is obvs the one you have to wed, right? Yeah, he was fuckballs crazy, but he also invented calculus (OR DID HE???) and got into world’s first flame war. Plus, he was also legitimately after The Philosopher’s Stone, which is awesome in every way something can be awesome. Alchemy is hot.

      I guess fuck Britney because fucking Jon would probs mean an angry Ygritte coming after you with arrows, and I don’t have time for that. Kill Mr know-nothing just by default, I guess? Whatever, his entire family is dead.

      This one was haaaaaaaaard.

      • http://thegloss.com/ Ashley Cardiff

        I’m so glad I’m not the only one who thinks alchemy is hot.

    • Sean

      Ok, now that I’ve played the gig I was terrified about, and finished Sunday’s book club meeting, I have all the time in the world to read “Night Terrors” by Ashley Cardiff.

      It arrives tomorrow. Gonna be a fuckin’ great week.

      Oh, and go ahead and marry Sir Issac, but please don’t distract him. Without him we might not have had computers, and they’re just swell.