• Mon, Jul 22 - 3:57 pm ET

Royal Baby’s Sex & Weight Have Finally Been Revealed!

kate middleton prince william royal baby

As you and anyone with a television, computer, phone or transistor radio knows, Kate Middleton went into labor at St. Mary’s Hospital in central London early this morning. Just minutes ago, the royal baby’s sex and weight were revealed: it is a boy weighing in at eight pounds and six ounces!

The unnamed Prince of Cambridge will have his birth announced on a wood and gold easel on the gates of Buckingham Palace, as is tradition. The declaration will announce his weight and sex, and will be signed by the doctors who delivered him. The child should eventually become king of England after succeeding the line of men who will take the throne after Queen Elizabeth.

Does anybody else find it kind of supremely amusing to imagine a situation wherein the royal baby is totally aware of all the fuss but is hella confused and also voiced by Bruce Willis? No? Okay. Just me, then.

Well, that’s your royal baby news for the day! Tune in tomorrow for when paparazzi and tourists slowly tear apart the hospital walls searching for the perfect angle so they can be first to Vine the kid. Bruce Willis’ voice will not be impressed.

Photo: Getty Images

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  • jess

    Fuck! I wanted it to be a girl! I’m so sick of male privilege!

    • Penny

      How is there any make privilege involved? If it was a girl she would have been the heir to the throne as well according to the new law, and they didn’t choose the gender of their baby. They didn’t even know about it until he was born.

  • Sean

    I just got home from grocery shopping, and believe it or not, they actually announced it in the store. Over the PA. Like it was a critical moment to everyone in the store.

    • Tania

      Oh, Canada. He will be our king eventually, I guess that’s why. I was hoping for a girl, though, I cannot tell a lie.

      Edited to add: I was not trying to make poetry, but I guess I did.

    • Sean

      I find myself incredibly torn over the entire thing. I’m not a huge monarchist, but there’s a quiet dignity to our allegiance (as Canada), and I feel like we should be more cool about it. I mean yay, baby, but still.

    • Tania

      Let’s just pretend the celebration is due to everyone being so happy for the Duchess no longer being hugely pregnant in July. She’s probably celebrating just as much!

  • anna

    I was so certain it was a female! So women I just think seem to have more dominant womanly genes than their spouse have strong manly genes? Yes, that is science. But i was so sure.

    • sue

      It’s all fake. She never looked pregnant. They hired a surrogate. Come on people smell the coffee. Or should I say the coffee substitute? She never gained weight or changed her appearance and she never showed signs of being pregnant except for a fake, low, oval shaped bump. Women can tell fake boobs from real ones and we can tell a fake baby bump from a real one.

    • Samantha_Escobar

      Supposing you’re right…honestly, who cares? It’s her choice.

    • Eileen

      Her face got a lot rounder. That’s hard to fake. Different women look pregnant in different ways, and tall, thin women often look “less” pregnant, especially with their first babies.

  • Cee

    Meh, I wanted her to have a daughter! The outfits, the dresses, the possibilities! Alas, Infanta Leonor of Spain rules the mini royal fashion scene.

    • Tania

      How well dressed would any daughter of Kate’s be?

  • Eileen

    So my coworker told me at lunch! I think I remember hearing that she had wanted a son, while William had wanted a daughter. So…since she was the one who had to be very pregnant in the middle of July, spend ten hours delivering a baby, and being sick right from the beginning, I’m glad she got what she wanted.