• Fri, Jul 26 2013

Bye

katharine hepburn

So, TheGloss, I’m leaving you.

It’s because you got fat.

Cue the musical number!

And there are other reasons. I will now be editing the NYO section of the New York Observer, which is a cool newspaper. It’s pink, so that’s a sign that it’s pretty cool right there, if, I suppose, you really love the color pink. Technically, I believe it’s salmon, but, close enough. I’ll also keep writing for the New York Post and Salon, and other places.

So, you know, I won’t be dead or anything.

I considered not writing a goodbye blog post. They generally strike me as self-congratulatory and self-indulgent. I am not going to list various pieces I’ve written over the course of three and a half years and ask you to clap for them. First, because you already did and, God help me, it meant the world when you did. Second, because I can frankly remember very few of them.

The problem with blogging – at least for me – is that you cannot remember anything you wrote by the end of the week.  That is not because TheGloss required too much output. The Gloss required a perfectly reasonable number of articles, and they paid me well for them. Memory fails just because that is the way blogs work. If you write thirty pieces a week, they will blur together into a sort of mush. When people ask me what I wrote that week, I stare at them blankly. If they suggest I had written about my desire to kill and eat children, I would probably nod and say, “Sounds about right.”

I mean, they would have just latched onto a correct assumption, though. I wouldn’t have actually written that.

Interestingly, though, I do remember other people’s pieces, which I had the great pleasure of editing.

Some of those were terrific.

I remember Jamie Peck’s piece on being sexually harassed by Terry Richardson, which was one of our first original reports, and the one that first placed us on Page Six. Jamie, we really should have paid you more. Maybe it would stop you from always trying to plan the revolution that would kill me. I’m still glad I was the one to photograph your breasts.

I remember Amanda Chatel’s brave, fantastic piece about her own abortion. Amanda is happy in Paris now, in case you were wondering.

I remember all of Allie Brosh’s pieces, but most especially her one on the Crack Cocaine Employment Plan. She has a book coming out now. You should probably buy it, because I bet it will be great. I am proud of the fact that we had even a small role in promoting her.

I remember Brandy Alexander’s love and dating pieces, and her defense of them. I liked that TheGloss showed different viewpoints, and didn’t toe one particular line.

I remember Lindsay Cross, who made me not only less afraid of marriage but also of parenting, by virtue of her doing both so excellently, and writing about them with such humor.

And Jen Dziura. The moment I saw her color coordinated closet, I accepted that she will forever do most everything better than me. But then, I already knew that.

I am forever walking around New York at early hours, and I never do so without thinking of Alice Walker Wright.

And Randi Newton – no one will ever do stunt pieces better than her. I mean, maybe someone some day, but not someone whose pieces I read for TheGloss.

Mallory Ortberg was and remains so brilliant that I am pretty much in awe of her. This piece. This one was my favorite. She has her own site now, The Toast, which you should visit if you are a lady who does not hate to laugh.

Thank you to Ashley Cardiff for being a longtime deputy editor and now managing editor of this wonderful site.

And then there’s Sam, who is a fantastic new addition to TheGloss. We talked about which piece of hers to list, but I am not going to list any, because I want to leave that spot open for her future.

I take great comfort in the fact that I’ve been working with the best.

As for me, well, I’m excited to be moving into a new chapter. I’ll probably be tweeting about that every five minutes, so if you want updates follow me on Twitter @jenashleywright. The Observer section has a nice interview with Gaby Hoffmann coming up, and one with Buzz Aldrin, and some other articles I think you will like, so maybe it would be fun to check out. I’m stupidly, ludicrously proud of the section.

And this chapter is closed. It’s odd, because I think as an adult you do not have graduation ceremonies. Chapters are not supposed to close definitively. You become accustomed to pretending that things are not really over. A few weeks ago, I said goodbye to an intern I knew I’d never see again. He mentioned he wasn’t coming in the next day and, as the elevator doors closed, I kind of awkwardly exclaimed, “I’m sure I’ll see you around!” It’s not polite to say, “I will never see you again. Toodles, forever.” Of course, saying otherwise is dishonest. This is not the case. Some things do end for good. This isn’t a Tony Kushner monologue. Things do get lost forever.

Well, maybe it is.

And fine. If you ever wanted to know, or clap for anything, this is my all time favorite post.

Bye now, you bright, lovely things.

I’m sure I’ll see you around.

Spitzer Testifies Before Reform Committee

Share This Post:
  • Sean

    I feel like I should be saying some sort of warm and fuzzy “goodbye & best of luck”, but I’m more curious whether they’re building a Thunderdome for the open Editor-In-Chief competition.

    And whether they’re selling tickets.

    • Samantha_Escobar

      Sean — we are not building a Thunderdome, but thank you for the idea as I have always had a strange desire to facilitate something along the lines of Battle Royale and the like.

      Also, DOLL FRIENDS!!

    • Sean

      Actually, doll friends sounds like a good idea. Thunderdomes sound like a pain to clean.

  • Fallon

    What about every Editors Debate???

  • LindsayCross

    I feel so very honored to be included in here. And I can’t wait to see all of the awesome things you do over at The Observer.

    • Jennifer Wright

      You were spectacular, and I hope you are always doing great stuff. Come back to New York soon!

  • Fabel

    Oh my god, I dreaded this day! (For real, I thought about you when positions were shifting all over at The Hairpin, & I thought, “I hope Jennifer Wright never leaves!!” And now you are :( )

    • Jennifer Wright

      Oh, I think positions are always shifting everyplace, and three and a half years is a REALLY LONG TIME. But I’ll miss you.

  • Nancy

    Sad to see you go, but I wish you good luck with your career, though you obviously don’t need it! When will the Shelved Dolls book be out? ;)

  • jamiepeck

    Oh buddy. Our relationship has always been a little bit weird because our world views terrify each other so much, but I am still sad to see you go. I’m glad you photographed my boobs, too.

    • Jennifer Wright

      When the revolution comes, you’re my only hope.

  • Malkovich

    As a longtime reader I will miss your articles especially Shelved Dolls.
    Hard to believe it has been over three years since you and Lilit created TheGlosss.

  • Amanda Chatel

    Jennifer, my funny, witty, amazing, lovely, sweet friend and fellow writer, there are no words for how much you will be missed.

    Your friendship means the world to me, and while I know that’s never going anywhere, I’m sad to no longer share The Gloss with you.

    You’ve inspired me to be a better writer, a kinder person, and have taught me to see things with the openness of how you view the world. You’ve had a major influence on me in both my professional and personal life, and it truly was an honor to be able to work along side you for the past couple years.

    You’ve impacted us all — writers and readers alike — and that’s a gift, my friend.

    • Jennifer Wright

      Buddy, now I am getting all teary. Thank you. I continue to love your pieces, and am so happy for all the good things that are going on with you right now.

  • Katy Hearne

    This is the worst news I’ve gotten all week (to be fair- though not to discredit my disappointment- it has been a slow week) . Please, please don’t tell me this is the end of Shelved Dolls.
    Also, mad props for Eleanor of Aquitaine up there telling us bye. Which brings me back to: I always wanted an Eleanor Shelved Dolls…. so you’re going to be writing those somewhere else or something- right?

    Best Wishes!

  • http://poorgoop.com/ Samantha

    Awwww! This bums me out. I mean, obviously, it’s great for you, and hooray. But Shelved Dolls is one of my favorite things to read every week, and I love your weird lists, and your writing, generally. Totally going to miss reading your work here!

  • http://ThePeppercat.com/ Candace

    Perfect picture.

  • Alwyn

    You had to put Harper’s “night flight to san francisco” monologue. You had to do that. From the best, most emotionally damaging play in the world. Next time, you should put Lincoln’s reeking-in-Kushner “promised land” speech from, well, Lincoln.

    but yeah. You were my first absolute favorite writer on this site and it’s a shame to see you go. Luckily the internet is pretty small, so I can still read your pretentious but actually self-aware and charming writing elsewhere.

    Godspeed!!

  • http://thegloss.com/ Ashley Cardiff

    There are too many to choose from, but for anyone needing “classic Jen,” this is an all-time favorite:

    http://www.thegloss.com/2010/11/10/sex-and-dating/gallery-how-to-be-awesome-on-a-date/

  • MR

    Gaby. I know someone who knew him when he was big: “F*cking Vietnaaam!!!” – that classic scene in ‘Forrest Gump’. Who pardoned him? I think it was Carter. PS. The Observer isn’t Republican. :)

    • MR

      PS. That was Abbie, not Gaby. I checked, and he died in ’89. Whoops. Yep, yours is real. Good luck!! Is this a good time to tell you I liked ‘You Got Mail’ better? I like a woman with books. :)

    • MR

      Also you know I’d like to believe that I’m the only one who got the meaning of your photo of Eleanor. Yeah, that was one of her greatest film – only ‘Bringing Up Baby’ and ‘Desk Set’ top it.

    • Jennifer Wright

      I’d say Philadelphia Story, but thank you, buddy.

    • MR

      I liked Cary Grant in the film, but as I already told you, I didn’t like Jimmy Stewart’s character. Again I’m seeing it from the guy’s side, so she is all I see whenever I re-visit the film on a occasion. You have been good to me. Kept me company, when I was at a really low point some two years ago now. Still searching but it doesn’t bother me as much. PS. My brother and his wife like your neck of the woods – the Main Line. Not an estate, but a very stately house in a very stately area. They had a boy about two months ago – she even froze her eggs – so yes, all is well in my not-so extended family. Yeah, I will read the Observer so you don’t disappear on me.

    • Amanda Chatel

      Wrong.

      She’s talking about Gaby Hoffmann the actress. You’re thinking about Abbie Hoffman the activist.

    • Samantha_Escobar

      lol

    • MR

      Just for the record. I figured it out without you.

    • MR

      PS. I hope everything works out for you too.

  • Ellen W.

    Jennifer no! Oh I’m happy that you’re getting a new cool job and all but I’m really only going to focus on me here and how I feel. Sad! I feel sad! Wehn I want to introduce people to The Gloss I send them the link for What Your Nail Shape Says About You and I can’t do that now because it would be wrong to lead them on like that. Who will teach me about my self though my superficial choices?
    I wish you all the best and will look for your byline all over the place!

    • Jennifer Wright

      Ellen – have no fear! The first chart in the Observer (and there will be a monthly “says about you” feature) is on what your summer vacation spot says about you.

  • Eileen

    Ack, I’ll miss you a lot. First Lilit (yes I realize that was like two years ago what of it) and now you :( Good luck!

  • Cee

    But..but…who will call out XOJane when it needs to? *frown*

  • Tania

    Oh noooo. What about Wed, Bed, Dead? What about Shelved Dolls? What about your silly lists that make other lists even more obviously ridiculous?

    :(

    • Jennifer Wright

      I’ll still do silly lists! For as long as I live, as God as my witness, I will do silly lists!

  • paperraincoat

    But. But you’re my favorite! D:

    Also, since links are flying about: http://www.thegloss.com/2011/05/16/culture/the-editors-debate-should-we-get-high-on-bath-salts/

  • Georgette

    Confused. Happy for you. Emotions? Hippo?

    • Jennifer Wright

      Turtle.

  • val

    wait…no…i just found the gloss and just consumed shelved dolls in a day because a) its awesome and b) its really awesome. now i’m total sadness.

  • ZanBrody

    Nooooooooo!! But, also…congrats to you!!

  • Anonachocolatemousse

    I really wish I had found The Gloss sooner than just a few months ago! Jennifer I think the first article I read on this site was Shelved Dolls. I immediately consumed all past articles and it’s been my Tuesday go to since then. Saying I’m sad seems selfish 1) because you are doing what’s best for you and 2) I am a stranger on the Internet.

    Seriously, best of luck at the Observer and I hope that one day you write a Shelved Dolls book (but only if you want, ya know)!

  • MR

    Good article on Gaby. Yeah, you and she covered a lot of ground. Not sure if I agree with her take on LA though. But she sees it from the Hollywood inside. In its neighborhoods – the 2 and a half years I lived there early ’86 to mid ’88 – I found it to have no emotional depth. Also she was too young to really see the first wave of the ’80s Wall Street gentrification in Nyc. But she’s right, the second wave starting early mid ’90s was much more violent. After, if you had grown up there during the ’60s and the ’70s, it was difficult to recognize the place.

  • Lisa(r)

    Aaaaaghhhhh!!!! Noooooooooo! Marie Antoinette! The sadness!!! But you’ll still be around, and I will google you, I will, I will! Thanks for everything.

  • http://thekimberlydiaries.com/ the kimberly diaries

    just got the memo on this since I saw the pic on your instagram… best of luck, Jen!