So you’ve probably read enough of the internet to know that for some American teens of European descent, tanning is a way of life, because…well, I’m not sure. I think The Jersey Shore has something to do with it. But how many teens do you think are actually browning themselves on the regs? 10%? 20%? Couldn’t be more than 25%, right?
Fucking thirty percent, guys. Thirty percent of our nation’s white youth are going fake baking on the regs. White people are so silly!
According to a new report from the Center for Disease Control and Prevention, 30% of white high school girls report having used indoor tanning devices (tanning booths, etc.) in the last year. And that number jumps up to 40% when you just look at 17-year-olds, and 44% among 18-year-olds. A good 17% of of those girls said they’d gone tanning at least ten times in the past year, with the highest rates by far coming from the South and the Midwest. What’s this world coming to?
This concerns the CDC, as indoor tanning before the age of 35 can elevate the risk of melanoma (the bad kind of skin cancer) by 59-75%, as well as increasing the risk of other kinds of skin cancers. “Reducing exposure to UV radiation from indoor tanning is an important strategy for reducing the burden of skin cancer,” said researchers. But what’s a little cancer in comparison to all the super-fine juice head love you will obtain if you can achieve the same shade of orange as Snooki?
The CDC recommends educating kids better about the dangers of tanning beds during their doctor visits, but I think it’s important to understand the root causes of tanning if we want to properly combat it. Do people think they look thinner when they’re tan? More fertile? Or are southerners simply trying to look more racially ambiguous in a futile attempt to give up white privilege they do not feel good about having?
As someone who doesn’t give a shit how pale I am, I once asked my southern roommate the rationale behind tanning, and she said, “a piece of meat looks more appealing when cooked.” No joke. In which case, I think we just need controversial raw meat diets to catch on among these key demographics. That should put a stop to tanning rather quickly. Either that, or we need to convince them that women’s flesh is not analogous to food. But probably the raw meat diets.