I’m such an old lady. I’m such an old lady you can usually find me over at Mommyish, where I’m the associate editor and prone to writing about my passion for kitten sweaters and how I really wish I could join a bridge club. Because I’m an old lady I totally swoon over weird old school beauty products and whenever I see any of these things for sale, or have an excuse to use my rat tail comb on myself, I totally jump at the opportunity . You may remember some of these, or you may remember your mom or grandma (Yipes!) using these, but I’m all about bringing sexy back, as long as “sexy” means weird, creepy, old-school beauty rituals.
Max Factor Pan Stick Makeup
It was a sad, sad day when they stopped selling this, because I swear it is the best foundation ever made. They still sell it here, but it’s almost 20 bucks which is like pretty pricey for what your mom probably purchased for two dollars back in the day. I’ve even seen this going for up to 60 dollars on eBay. Why is it so great? It’s amazingly blend-able, it covers like mad, and it makes you look like a mooooovie star!
Sure, they still make dusting powder but how popular is it? Not very. I love the packaging and the pooofy puffs that come with it and the notion of sitting at my dressing table and applying dusting powder before I go to fall social which basically translates to “cleaning cat puke off my kitchen floor.”
My mom totally used to use this and I have no idea why companies don’t make it anymore, but I think it has to do with the fact that powder mascara is dry to begin with and if you are using a dry mascara it lasts a lot longer because it never dries out, duh. All I know is it used to give my mom total Liz Taylor as Cleopatra eyelashes without even using falsies.
Longcils Boncza Eyeliner
This stuff is the shit and you can still buy it here. It’s the best cat-eye liquid eyeliner and was was first made in the 1950′s. And it’s made in France and that means it is totally fancy.
In order to really master pin curls I think you have to grow up doing them, and no matter how many you tube tutorials I watch I still have issues not ending up with big boppy-pin lines in my hair. Or else you need to find a super bored old lady to school you in the proper way to do it.
I am so obsessed with orange lipstick it isn’t even funny, and I cannot find a single shade that looks decent on me. I’ve tried Jenna Lyons‘ shade. I’ve tried pretty much everything Mac makes. Next up I’m going to go with Cosomopop by Lime Crime but it’s out of stock right now, boooo. My quest for an orange lipstick that looks decent on me is never-ending.
False Eyelashes All The Time
You know who wears false eyelashes all the time? Cool girls and porn stars. I will rock them if I have a fancy night out but I know in the wayback women used to wear them daily. Because they look amazing! My issue is that I’m usually wearing glasses or contacts, and it’s super hard to wear ‘em when you have glasses on, unless there is some fancy trick I am unaware of.