Yet another reminder that adolescence is the worst: several students were hospitalized after the world’s best indicator of juvenile dating instinctsÂ was released in their school. You know of what I speak — that silly little scent that every eighth grade boy assumed was A+, completely ignoring the fact that, after spraying themselves, everyone gave him a good four foot radius of space for the next few hours? That’s right, I’m talking aboutÂ Axe body spray.
Apparently, somebody “released” a can of every SAE’s fave pseudo-cologneÂ in a Brooklyn schoolÂ which led to several students requiring medical attention. As a side note, is this similar to releasing the Dogs of War? Or is it more like jerking off and releasing — well, you know. I’m just curious to understand how one “releases” Axe, unless they just mean “spray.” #axeprobs
Anyway, a statement from the Department of Education stated thatÂ â€śEMS transported eight students to the hospital, and parents of two students took them to their own doctors,â€ť which is all terribly frightening, but fortunately, there were no serious injuries. Nevertheless, it is alarming (if a little hilarious) that the world’s least appealing cologne isÂ actuallyÂ noxiousÂ to some.
Side note: A few months ago, I gave my boyfriend cologne after telling him I like a nice, distinct scent on dudes (I occasionally get men’s products to try and so I figured it would be fun to use him as a willing guinea pig). I wound up pickingÂ Calvin Klein Encounter,Â a pretty rad scent that smells fresh and crisp. I wish I could say I gave it to him because I thought he’d like it, but I would be lying if I didn’t admit that it was alsoÂ because I felt mildly afraid he might wind up grabbing some random bottle of Axe from the grocery store. I have ulterior motives and am a bad person, I know. :( But in retrospect, maybe my instincts were simply protecting my health…
Photo: Axe’s Facebook.