• Thu, Nov 21 - 5:32 pm ET

The Most Expensive Holiday Gift Guide Ever For The Fancy Pants In Your Life

marie antoinetteThe holidays are careening towards us, so you know what that means: gift guides. We want to make sure you’re able to show the women in your life that you care, so our Incredibly Expensive Holiday Gift Guide For The Women In Your Life is here to make sure that you’re not too stressed about how to show your best ladies that you care.

You might be interested in keeping your budget low, but this year, we’re advising you to reach for the stars, dollar dollar bills-wise. The holidays are the time of the year when you should be showing people how much you love them, and the best way to do that involves opulent presents that you could buy for more reasonable price, but won’t. What a lovely way to show people how important they are in your life.

I’ve always felt that women can be difficult to shop for, because they have such refined tastes and require such expensive commodities. Furthermore, it can be hard to figure out a gift that’s appropriate for each individual relationship in your life—you certainly wouldn’t buy your best friend and your boyfriend’s mother the same thing.

And so, to help you deal with the impending holiday stress, we’ve put together a list of gifts for all of the women in your life. It’s never too early to start stocking up on holiday gifts, and the general rule should be the more expensive, the care you care. Bonus: They’re two gifts in there for you. You deserve it!

Photo: Marie Antoinette

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  • Joanna Rafael

    Do my boring crystal-free tweezers make me look poor?

    • CMJ

      Seriously, I was all impressed with my swiss-designed tweezers (my eyebrows are epic) and then I just got tweezer shamed by those things.

  • diane kaston

    Oy vey, none of my fashionista friends are rich enough to buy me all this swag for chanukah, oh dear, i guess it will be gelt again! :)

  • Samantha_Escobar

    I’m so confused, is that nail polish even colored?!

    • CMJ

      I think it’s the bottle that’s so special because of the glass? But who gives a fuck about a fancy bottle for your clear nail polish? Is it reusable? How do I get nail polish in there? SO MANY QUESTIONS!

  • http://fairlyoddmedia.com/ Frances Locke

    I want all of these things. Even the vibrator…especially the vibrator. And I expect gift wrap.