• Fri, Dec 6 - 1:59 pm ET

Even Kate Middleton Can’t Keep Her Cool Around Sex Machine Idris Elba

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My love for Idris Elba is well documented, and my admiration of Kate Middleton, a paragon of grace and elegance (who seems like she could have a good time) is unparalleled. Seeing the two of them in one photo is almost too much for my tender heart to take. And yes, be still, my heart:

The Royal Film Performance Of "Mandela: Long Walk To Freedom" - Red Carpet Arrivals

Look at the two of them! Look at how overwhelmed Kate looks, which is completely understandable. This is basically my perfect fantasy of meeting him in person: Girl, looking stunning and comfortable, reacts adorably and appropriately overwhelmed, and Idris Elba acts totally cool (he’s making a cool face, right? It’s not skeptical.) about it and definitely thinks she’s really charming. And in this scenario the girl is me. I am Kate Middleton, future queen. My king is Idris Elba, Sex Alien Ruler From Outer Space. His penis has magical powers, but it would be un-ladylike of me to elaborate. I feel weird having articulated all of that now, but I trust we can all be adults about this.

As someone who gets flustered when meeting people every day (I literally introduced myself as “Julia?” not long ago), it’s really nice to see this idealized, never-a-hair-out-of-place woman getting flustered, too. But really. Who wouldn’t? It’s Idris fucking Elba.

Oh, look who managed to keep his cool?

The Royal Film Performance Of "Mandela: Long Walk To Freedom" - Red Carpet Arrivals

You think you’re better than me, William? You are.

Photo: Getty Images // Gif: Tumblr

Share This Post:
  • Lindsey Conklin

    How does her hair look so good in a pony tail? Ahh, he’s gorgeous, those lucky royals.

  • Human Target

    She’s so pretty and looks great even post baby!

  • Samantha_Escobar

    Can’t get over how appropriate that GIF is.

  • Alexis H

    I love this picture! She really does strike me as a genuine and fun (or at least pleasant) person. I am shocked by her thinness, though. Not in a concern-troll way (she looks great!), just a “holy shit, that is a narrow human being” way, much like my “holy shit, her hair is shiny” reaction to this picture. One woman, so many extremes.