The Amazing Body Positive Essay Every Woman At Every Weight Should Read


You may have seen some coverage around the internet of the “Bodies Aren’t Ugly, Bullying Is” project, spearheaded by blogger Jes Baker of The Militant Baker. It’s a terrific project, one that I’m glad is getting more major attention. But what’s even better is that Baker has just penned a seriously amazing essay titled “Things no one will tell fat girls…so I will.” And I think Baker’s essay should be required reading for everyone who has a body, no matter their weight or their gender.

Writing on Australia’s Daily Life site, Baker lays out fourteen statements to overweight women, including “You don’t need to exercise every day to feel better about yourself,” “You’re not stunning despite your body, you’re stunning because of your body,” and “When people say you’re gorgeous, believe them.” My personal favorite quotes comes in regards to self-love:

You’re allowed to fall in love with yourself. I promise. This will be the scariest thing you will ever do, and that’s okay. It will also be the most amazing (albeit super gradual) experience you will ever have. It doesn’t make you narcissistic. It doesn’t make you vain. It is liberating in every form of the word.

OMG. Yes. Yes. Yes! That quote makes me feel like a woman in a 90s Herbal Essences commercial. So much yes.

Baker’s essay seems particularly timely, both in light of Baker’s bullying project, the recent Twitter trend of #fatmicroaggressions, which exposed the constant undercurrent of fat shaming in society, as well as the recent attention given to Maria Kang and her particular brand of fat-shaming. In my opinion, women can’t hear this kind of empowering, positive, honest discourse enough. In a world that constantly tells us and shows us what’s wrong with our bodies, our faces, our hair, our skin and our lives, Baker’s essay shows fat girls (and the people who love them) that we’re all just fine the way we are.

Photo: Liora K Photo via The Militant Baker on Facebook

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    • Lindsey Conklin

      That quote is amazing!

    • Louis

      OK….I have 2 daughters…the 16 year old is on the heavy side…I’m positive….I tell her she is beautiful (she is!!)….I don’t dwell or comment on her weight. Loved this article/author….do I forward to daughter #2….or not? Thanks for helping guide a single Dad.

      • Ali

        Yes! Many, many women, no matter what their size have body issues.

      • Andrea Dunlop

        This is a toughie. As a formerly heavy sixteen year old, I might have gone to pieces receiving anything that was intended to speak to “fat girls”. I think it’s all about how you present it to her. As a grown-up, I can recognize the value of this for ALL women and think it’s fabulous. Maybe your daughter is more mature re: her body image than I was at that age, you know her best but I would tread lightly. Also, bless you for being proactive.

      • Louis

        Thanks Andrea…my instinct is no….but I’ll save it and perhaps there will be a right time to point her to it.

    • elle

      Ooh I actually love this! I still carry a part of me ED in that I don’t really know what I look like. seriously, it’s very bizarre but when I see pictures of myself it takes me a minute to connect in my brain that it’s a picture of me, especially if it’s a good pic. I also think I’m always very overweight even though I know at my height/weight the most I am is kinda…squishy I guess. loving/accepting myself is something I have and probably will be working on for the rest of my life. I’m so bookmarking this for days I feel super down about myself.