• Fri, Dec 27 - 2:20 pm ET

WTF? People Are Tweeting Their Incest Fantasies

kissing cousinsI was clicking about the internet, looking for some news when I happened upon this gem of a piece on the Huffington Post entitled “There Are Plenty Of Twitter Users Who FInd Their Cousins Hot.” It’s just what the doctor ordered for an SVU fan with twisted curiosities.

On Christmas night, a man about the internet who tweets as @Mobute, went on what the Huffington Post called “an epic retweeting spree.” This is the first retweeting frenzy I’ve ever beheld. It really was epic. It appears that an unnervingly number of people find their cousins hot and are down to share that with the whole internet via Twitter.

Here are my two, um, favorites:incest tweet

The familyzone. I can’t. incest tweet

That is a secret you should save for your diary.

If you like weird stuff, please do yourself a favor and check out HuffPo’s list of some of the weirdest tweets.

Maybe I’m being too judgmental by thinking people who find their cousins hot is totally creepy and wrong, but this kind of thing has been making people feel weird for a long time. According to Freud in Totem and Taboo*, incest is one of the first taboos. Perhaps some people don’t consider kissing cousins to be as stomach-churningly horrifying as say brother-sister or parent-child stuff, but uh, whatever the degree of separation, finding your family hot is still something you might want to keep between you and your analyst.

* I read it in college.

Image via 30 Rock (NBC)

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  • CMJ

    Well that is some Flowers in the Attic shit.

    • Joanna Rafael

      SERIOUSLY.

  • Cee

    Most of them seem to be huge One Direction fans….correlation?!

    • Joanna Rafael

      :( I’m too scared to investigate further.

  • Keith Pullman

    Um, about half of US states will legally marry first cousins, and I don’t think there is any restriction on second cousins, etc. Many countries will marry first cousins (Sweden will marry half-siblings) and in many countries, the practice is very common. Talk with a genealogist and/or someone who can do the math. For most of human history, most people married a cousin, whether a first, second, etc, perhaps once or twice removed, or not.

    • Joanna Rafael

      Could you point me to some evidence that “most people married a cousin” for “most of human history” please? And Um, it still makes me and a lot of other people uncomfortable. You do you if you want to fuck your family though.

    • Keith Pullman

      Don’t believe me? Go ask any real genealogist. A lot of people are uncomfortable with interracial relationships. I guess that means it is OK to make fun of people in those relationships?

      Here’s the explanation about history that I’d already written elsewhere:

      With each previous generation you trace back, the maximum possible
      number of your genetic ancestors doubles. You can have 2 parents, up to
      4 grandparents, up to 8 great-grandparents, up to 16
      great-great-grandparents, etc.

      On average, there are about four generations per century. For people
      born in the year 2000, their 8 great-great-grandparents were probably
      born around 1900. Sometime around 1800 their
      great-great-great-great-great-great-grandparents were born (there may be
      up to 128 of them). About 29 generations back, or roughly around the
      time of 1250-1300, the total number of your possible ancestors for that
      generation equals or exceeds the total population of the planet, which
      was about 500 million people.

      What gives? Well, first of all, if all 500 million of those people were your ancestors, they would also be the ancestors of all of the rest of us, too.

      Secondly, you probably don’t have every person alive back
      then as your ancestor. There wasn’t a lot of interracial or
      intercultural parenting going on back then. People were more isolated,
      more people lived in rural countrysides rather than dense urban areas,
      and people were not nearly as geographically or socially mobile as they
      are today. It was very common for a person to be born in and to die in
      the the same village or town, having lived all of her or his life there.

      This means that for many, many, many, many generations, there was a lot
      of what most people would call today “inbreeding.” If your spouse wasn’t
      your first cousin, your spouse was likely second or third cousin, or a cousin-once-removed, etc.

      Coming back to around 1800, very few people are likely to have 128
      great-great-great-great-great-great-grandparents, just like very few of
      those people in 1800 had 128 of them in 1600. Because chances are, some
      of your recent ancestors were cousins, if not closer. If you marry your
      first cousin, you have no more than six genetic grandparents between
      you, instead of eight.

    • Julia Sonenshein

      George Michael Bluth? Is that you?

  • Arekushieru

    Your comment against being put in the ‘familyzone’ implies that you think the friendzone is a real thing, while the familyzone is not. Can you say sexist, bigoted and heteronormative all in one breath? If not, that would, unfortunately, not be surprising, even though that is exactly what you did with this post, here…. Oops.

    • Joanna Rafael

      How did you come to that conclusion? I’d love for you to elaborate. All I said was “the family zone. I can’t.” and that in no way implies that I think the friendzone is real.

      Did you seriously call me a sexist and heteronormative bigot while implying that I’m stupid all because I was making fun of someone for saying they were familyzoned?