• Mon, Dec 30 - 10:45 am ET

6 (Extremely Likely) Fashion Trend Predictions For 2014

Shutterstock

Shutterstock

This year was all about bold lipstick, the reemergence of the crop top, and horrible awful peplums. What kinds of trends will 2014 bring? Here’s a totally accurate, 100% reliable guide to the upcoming year’s fashions.

Netflix

Netflix

1. Prison jumpsuits. Orange is the New Black was a huge hit in 2013, and all the buzz surrounding the show will surely make its second season even more popular. Just like the world tried to replicate Jennifer Aniston‘s Friends haircut, everyone this year will be sporting unwashed hair, baggy uniforms, and toothbrush shivs. Remember how Julianne Hough “honored” her favorite character by donning blackface? It’ll be just like that, except not horrible.

2. Ironic Hannah Montana merchandise. The reign of Miley Cyrus doesn’t look like it’ll be coming to a close anytime soon, and while MC obviously thinks of herself as a badass, we can’t let her forget her glittery, purple roots.

Disney

Disney

3. Horns. Disney’s upcoming Maleficent doesn’t need to be good– it stars Angelina Jolie as a sexy-terrifying villain. It seems pretty much inevitable that we’ll all start wearing capes and red lipstick and horns. Especially the horns.

That '70s Show

That ’70s Show

4. Bellbottoms, platform shoes, and wrap dresses. The last season of Mad Men will probably take place in the early 1970s, and I’ll pretty much try to replicate anything I see on that show. (Did you know that bartenders look at you weird when you order an Old Fashioned? And that you can’t smoke cigarettes in your therapists’ office?)

WENN

WENN

5. Pixie cuts. The general public needs a year or two to come to terms with radical hairstyles, and since Anne Hathaway, Jennifer Lawrence, and Rihanna have all gone short, it’s only a matter of time before the rest of us get the courage. Short hair will look really good with our Maleficent horns.

WENN

WENN

6. Head-to-toe yellow. After seeing Kim Kardashian (arguably) pull it off, I feel like there must be at least a sliver of hope for us normals. Black is boring and white is too easy to stain. This will be the year of the Big Bird costume.

Are you prepared to make a Hannah Montana-themed jumpsuit, cut your hair off, and ram people with your pointy headdress? I thought so. Happy 2014!

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  • Lindsey Conklin

    So not prepared for these predictions hahaha except maybe the old fashioned mad men inspired garb…that I could do

    • Muggle

      Yeah, I could do early 70s fashion… not so much anything else.

    • Jane

      So far it looks like Mad Men’s still in the 60s for next year. Unless the late 60s and early 70s are almost interchangeable fashion-wise? :/

    • Muggle

      I don’t think there was that much difference. The 70s didn’t really get all that flamboyant until the middle of the decade. Come to think of it, every decade’s fashion was much like that of the decade before it.

  • Charmless

    I have the most amazing high-waisted blue bellbottoms. They’re the sort that are so tight that I need to lie down to do them up, but they’re glorious and I get the weirdest looks from people under 50 when I wear them in public (the people over 50 look at me with wistful nostalgia). I would LOVE it if 70s fashion came back. I only feel comfortable wearing pants if they’re ridiculous in some way. My other favorites are a pair of wide-legged plaid wool grandpa trousers.