Today is Kate Middleton’s birthday, and we’re sure she’s celebrating more fancily than we would be, ideally in ways that will make everyone freak out for some reason. Because whenever the Duchess of Cambridge does anything, people freak out.
In fact it has been a very good year for overreacting to Kate Middleton. In honor of her 32nd birthday, let’s look at some of the things she’s done this year that people have overreacted to.
We’ve all taken a bad picture now and then, but Kate Middleton’s official portrait makes her look like she should be peering out of the hole in the cover of a VC Andrews book. Art historians the world over gathered to offer their opinions on what this painting says about the future of Britain’s hereditary aristocracy.
Kate Middleton is totally a liar, right? There’s no way she is addicted to Keeping Up With The Kardashians.
The slight increases in the size of Kate Middleton’s stomach were front-page news for a few months there. We’re still not sure why people were constantly shocked by its growth, because that’s pretty much all baby bumps do until they stop.
People camped out in front of the hospital all around her due date, because Kate Middleton is the first person in the world to ever have a baby.
This was actually pretty awesome. A lot of us had no idea that a woman who has just had a baby will still look pregnant immediately afterwards.
A little while after having had a baby, Kate Middleton went for a volleyball and everyone saw her perfectly flat, toned stomach. We all knew it was there, but we freaked out anyway.
Princess Shinylocks gets some help in the color department, but it had been a while since her last visit when she went out for Poppy Day. This is just what hair does sometimes, but it was still front-page news.
Oops. Now everyone is convinced she thinks dead soldiers are hilarious.
This is pretty much what every human being would do in this situation.
Kate Middleton has worn this dress three times now, and by fairy tale rules that means it has magic powers.