• Sun, Jan 12 - 9:25 pm ET

Red Carpet Rundown: The (Unexpectedly) Worst Dressed At The 71st Golden Globe Awards

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We already brought you the “Best Dressed” list from the 71st Golden Globes, but now, we bring you the full rundown on who needs to fire their stylists, who needs to and who did not look in the mirror prior to leaving their very expensive hotel suites. While there are a few celebs on this list who are not known for their solid style, there were plenty I surprised at–namely, Aubrey PlazaKerry Washington and Tina Fey, among others.

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Hayden Panettiere needs to fire anybody who had anything to do with this look. Possibly including Tom Ford.

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Sarah Hyland is a little too Easter egg for my taste.

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

As a third grade, I made dresses like Aubrey Plaza’s for my Barbie dolls. Though those Barbies made have continuously smiled throughout their monotonous, plastic lives, I knew that inside, they longed to belong to a kid with a decent fashion sense.

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Megan Mullaly‘s leg-o-mutton sleeves simultaneously bum me out and make me want one of those giant turkey legs from Disneyland. But she and Nick Offerman are so cool that it’s okay.

BEVERLY HILLS, CA - JANUARY 12: Actress Paula Patton attends the 71st Annual Golden Globe Awards held at The Beverly Hilton Hotel on January 12, 2014 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Jason Merritt/Getty Images)

Somewhere, a bridezilla’s wedding cake is missing its frosting because Paula Patton is wearing it.

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Mike Tyson, because (A) he’s wearing a patterned tux (B) he’ll always be on my “Worst” list for anything ever because he’s a bad person.

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Kate Mara‘s look reminds me of what people in the 1950s imagined we’d dress like in 2000. (To be fair, Christina Aguilera sort of did.)

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

I was conflicted about this one, because I love Sofia Vergara and I actually kinda like the Zac Posen dress, but…that Lorraine Schwartz necklace. It ruins everything. All the things: they’re ruined.

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

We get it Joanna Newsom: YOU’RE WEIRD.

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Anna Gunn‘s dress, as Julia mentioned earlier, has got that whole Georgia O’Keeffe vulva glam going.

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Creamsicle combined with Forever 21 lingerie = Louise Roe‘s dress.

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Maria Menounos is practically a staple of our “Worst Dressed” posts, so hai Maria!

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Speaking of which, I had a feeling I would be putting Allison Williams on here…So, thanks for that, everyone who styled her + Alexander McQueen.

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Oh, Sandra Bullock. Girl, you know we think you’re great, but what is going on with this Prabal Gurung dress?

71st Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Not feeling Gabourey Sidibe‘s boring gown. If this fabric were slightly less plastic-looking and less loose, I might dig it more.

Now for some seriously surprising ones…

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  • CMJ

    Would it have killed people to put something other than nude lipstick on?

  • Cee

    I was washing dishes while Jacqueline Bisset was speaking, but even the chunks I heard sounded like a train wreck

  • elle

    I still like Allison Williams dress, I don’t even care if I’m the only one. In fact I’m doubling down, after some initial hesitation I decided I really, really like it.

  • Alexis H

    Hayden Panettiere is the “edgy but approachable” girl at every prom in 2000. I don’t know if I should be appalled or impressed by how well she nailed that.

  • Alexis H

    I also can’t help but see this when I look at Joanna Newsom’s dress: http://www.cheese-magnet.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/firefly-shindig-mal-kaylee-dress1.jpg

    • Holly

      I will wear this dress one day. I will.

  • tifygodess24

    Why is Taylor swift at the golden globes?

    • Katy Hearne

      I had the same question

    • Mandie

      She was nominated for best song for some movie I’ve never heard of or seen. Did not win.

    • carly tenney

      had do to with a song she recorded for a movie soundtrack

    • G.E. Phillips

      Not sure, but I actually really loved her dress.

  • killersandliars

    Laura Dern looked amazing when she was moving on camera. I think that still photos just don’t capture the dress right. Honestly, of the part of the show I watched, her dress was definitely my favorite, along with Helen Mirren. Her hair and makeup looked lovely too.

  • Katy Hearne

    I don’t know why, but I hated Hayden Pamettiere’s dress so much… I kind of took it personally. I don’t know her, but this look (oh, the hair) hurt my feelings for some reason

    • http://maitribathbody.com/ Maitri

      I actually think she looks great. Dunno why the hate.

  • Sally

    There were some really nice looking dresses, but I am not a fan of Sandra’s dress whatsoever. Oh well, whatever makes her happy!
    Sally

  • ColoradoLoC

    I kind of like all the dresses in here, don’t get the hate…

  • carly tenney

    I can’t believe Julia Roberts is NOT on this list! She looked HIDEOUS!!!

    • keanesian

      But she is?

  • Claire

    Eh, I have to give some of them props for at least trying something different. Imagine how boring the red carpet would be if it was just a repeat of Elie Saab’s latest show

  • Lindsey Conklin

    I agree with this list completely. But, Kate mara’s boobs look perfect haha

  • Madame X

    Megan Mullaly and Joanna Newsome both would have looked fabulous if the dresses just lost the sleeves.

    • Samantha Escobar

      Agreed so hard.

  • Sexlovesounds

    I love the dresses on Laura Dern, Lizzy Caplan, Sofia Vergara, Allison Williams, and I would like Zooey Deschanel (sorry hard to spell, I had to copy-paste) if the top was fitted.

    Props to Matthew Mconaghey for originality.

    I feel like Joanna Newsom is like Helena Bonham-Carter, that is just her thing and she gives no fucks and therefore it rocks.

    • Holly

      I feel like they do give a lot of fucks though and that’s why they do what they do. Maybe I’m just a Judgy Julie, but it’s how I feel, man. It’s how I feel.

  • G.E. Phillips

    Glad someone agreed with me about Kerry Washington, because I saw her on a bunch of best-dressed lists, and I was like, really? The color and the cut of that dress were very strange.

  • Holly

    Jennifer Lawrence’s dress reminds me of a hastily wrapped body that is about to be dumped somewhere. However, I LOVE her makeup.

    • Samantha Escobar

      You win my favorite comment on the day award. Which is an award I just invented, but still…you win it.

    • Holly

      I’ve been waiting to win this award since I first heard about it. Which was right now. :)

  • Kamala Jones

    Mike Tyson is one of the best dressed celebrity men and it has been that way for decades now. Many people just never paid attention.

  • Kate

    How did Drew Barrymore escape this list?? She looked like the card I gave my crush for Valentine’s day in third grade
    http://media1.onsugar.com/files/2014/01/12/117/n/1922564/896e992dbd210b91_drew-poll.jpg.xxxlarge.jpg

    • http://maitribathbody.com/ Maitri

      I think she’s adorable, and not just because we share a birthday down to the year. We’re twins. Anyway, she’s a free spirited hippie type and I think this is way cute.

    • Kate

      Hey, I agree that she’s adorable! I just didn’t like her dress at all and was surprised that some of the other dresses were labeled “worst dressed” and this wasn’t (namely Taylor’s, Kate’s, Maria’s, and Anna’s). To each their own I guess!

    • Alexis H

      She gets pregnancy immunity.

  • Jaysie

    I agree with the majority of this list with the exception of Lizzy Caplan’s absolutely stunning dress, and I think Allison Williams dress was fun and adventurous.

  • Amanda

    Your list lost all credibility when you put Matthew McConaughey on it. He looked INCREDIBLE and his wife looked fantastic. That green velvet jacket= to die for. They are by far the best dressed couple on the carpet. Hands. down.

  • alex

    whoever wrote this quit while your ahead. Your opinions are awful and you write like i would talk in high school.

  • justme

    Was Jennifer Lawrence wearing Ariel’s sheet dress from The Little Mermaid?