Photoshop Of Horrors: Dita Von Teese Just Got A Real Housewives Makeover

“This is bizarre,” writes Dita Von Teese, and we couldn’t agree more. We stared at this Instagram picture of Dita Von Teese with a strange woman who looks a little bit like Dita Von Teese for 15 minutes before realizing that the woman on the right is Dita Von Teese. Some clever Photoshop wizard digitally altered the burlesque star to give her red carpet-standard beachy gold waves, a tan, and some pink lipstick.

While most Photoshop disasters we find are just the result of a ham-fisted graphic designer taking beauty ideals a step too far, this particular example is more like a magic mirror into an alternate dimension where everybody is their own opposites. It’s a pretty cool trick. We bet Alternate Dimension Dita Von Teese and Alternate Dimension Lady Gaga are frequently confused for each other, while the rest of us go around in extreme beauty drag at all times.

The transformation is amazing. Both Ditas look beautiful, but the real Dita looks like an old-school movie star, while the beachy version looks like a Real Housewife or a contestant on a reality TV singing program, even though they’re wearing the same dress.

The weird thing is that these looks would probably take exactly the same amount of time to achieve. Neither is a low-maintenance aesthetic. But this just goes to show how much we can transform ourselves if we want to. A different haircut, lipstick color, and either throwing away or stepping up our use of bronzer can make a person look completely different. It might be fun for an afternoon.

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    • Lindsey Conklin

      Dita looks so much better unphotoshopped!!

    • Mandie

      Further proof that she is a goddess and can rock any look.

    • ScarletRegina

      Something about photoshopped Dita reminds me of Sarah McLachlan.

    • Charmless

      Confession: I give myself makeovers like this sometimes and selfie the results. It’s disturbing how different I look with just some fake-tanner, smoky eye makeup, and a blonde wig.

      I tweeted the result once and a male friend kinda hurt my feelings by replying that I should try that look more often. Y’know, thanks for subtly insulting my personal style and implying that you didn’t think I was pretty until you saw me done up to fit your standard.

      • Elizabeth Licata

        That sounds like fun! The messing around with fake tanner and wigs, I mean. It sounds like an entertaining way to spend an evening.

    • Cate

      What’s funny is that Dita usually dresses up like photoshopped Dita in this photo for Halloween, it’s just rare that you see her in the same pose in the same dress to get a real comparison. The results are always equally unsettling though.