Celebrity feuds are so weird. One day, you’re making out in front of several thousand screaming fans; the next, you’re tweeting and doing interviews about how gross your individual mouths are. Make up your minds, all you famous weirdos! Or in this case, justÂ Katy Perry andÂ Miley Cyrus.
Quick recap: During one of Miley’s Bangerz concerts in February, she leaned over to the front row and made out with Katy Perry for a few seconds. It was a match made in Madonna/Britney/ChristinaÂ publicity heaven. Then, on Tuesday, Katy told Australian talk showÂ SunriseÂ that the kiss wasn’t nearly as sexy as every celeb media outlet may have said:
â€śI just walked up to her to give her like a friendly girly kiss, you know, as girls do, and then she like tried to move her head and go deeper and I pulled away.
â€śGod knows where that tongue has been. We donâ€™t know! That tongue is so infamous!â€ť
This wasn’t exactly a nice thing to say, particularly when the two seem like they are actually friends with one another. Naturally, Miley being Miley and all, she just had to respond in the form of this tweet:
She followed that up with a really, really odd piece of, ahem, art:
So basically, Katy called Miley’s tongue dirty and disgusting and way too pushy for her delicate lady kiss sensibilities. To show how mature she is, Miley calledÂ John Mayer dirty and disgusting and all sorts of slutty. (Or is it aboutÂ Russell Brand?)Â But it’s all okay because LOOK AT THIS LOVELY WATERCOLOR OF US MAKING OUT!
It kind of feels like that special brand of passive-aggressive fight reserved for middle schoolers and contestants onÂ Big Brother. I think I primarily do not dig this is because both women are implying a certain dirtiness that comes from sexual experience, but I also just think it’s stupid to do interviewsÂ on television and trade insultsÂ on the Internet no matter who you are. The only people I know who still write passive-aggressive tweets and Instagram captions are perennial man- and woman-children who have no acknowledged their age increasing since the eighth grade.