Sometimes, it is hard to believe that the sameÂ Jennifer Lopez we saw wear that epicÂ Versace gown at the 2000 Grammy Awards is the same woman we see on the red carpet (and off) today. It’s not like she looks any different–her face, body and hair have barely changed in years. However, J. Lo’s sense of style has rolled so far down the hill, it’s decided to pass out at the bottom and started to sprout grass.
Yesterday, J. Lo wore the above outfit to a taping ofÂ American Idol in West Hollywood, as opposed to an elementary school’s office supply pageant she’s presumably playing the role of “Highlighter #1.” The look consisted of twoÂ J Brand pieces: super skinny jeans in ‘Wildlower’ ($218) and the Auden top in ‘Signal Pink’ ($195), which were accompanied by a pair of Louboutin pumps…meaning she probably spent more on this look than your did on your entire 2013 wardrobe additions, depending on how much you drop on clothes and how much debt is preventing you from buying cool clothes (hi).
Her hair is rather Barbie-like (more Barbie-like than her actual Barbie, as a matter of fact), so that’s awesome or awful depending on how you feel about Barbie’s style. The odd thing about all this brightness is that she decided to go bronze and metallic with her makeup, which clashes quite a bit.
If she had justÂ really invested in this totally neon look, perhaps someÂ OCC Lip Tar in a similar shade would have been in order.
J. Lo is obviously not entirely to blame here; it’s the sheer idea that all-over (or even some-over) neon is a good look that is responsible for this travesty. Neon is just kind of gross. It hurts my eyes to stare at for too long. And yes, for the sake of this argument, one of the most famous and successful musicians of the past two decades is required to please my eyes with her color schemes.
Look, J. Lo. I love you–primarily for doingÂ SelenaÂ but also for other reasons!–so I’m telling you this as a friend. A friend you never talk to, do not know in real life, and are completely unaware of. But then again, if being a 5’5″ highlighter makes you happy, I will do as friends do and probably wear a bright yellow one right along with you. From afar. Because we don’t actually know each other.
AND TOGETHER WE SHALL REIGN.
Photos:Â J. Sharma/Bruja, PacificCoastNews