• Mon, Apr 21 - 4:20 pm ET

19 Fetishes That Are Automatic Deal Breakers For Our Readers, In GIFs

On Friday, we posted an open thread asking which fetishes our readers consider to be deal breakers. This all stemmed from a rather horrible story about a man, a mommy fetish and an even creepier kid-related fetish that required some commiseration, which you lovely people supplied. While fetishes and kinks are a-okay in and of themselves (provided they’re fulfilled in safe, consensual manners), each of us as an individual has the right to rule out stuff we’re not into.

A number of you seemed to have similar aversions to specific fetishes, so we decided it might be fun to compile them into a list. Oh, and add some illustrative GIFs, because that’s how we roll when it comes to awkward situations.

1. Infantalism.

2. Asking to be called “papa” in bed.

3. Actually, just any relative’s title. Whatsoever.

4. Hand jobs.

5. Spankings.

6. Pee.

7. Scat play.

8. Strap-ons.

19 Fetishes That Are Automatic Deal Breakers For Our Readers, In GIFs

Via.

9. Balloon popping.

10. Feet.

11. Humiliation.

12. Exhibitionism.

13. Cannibalism.

14. Bathroom cannibalism. Hoo boy.

15. Talking like a baby.

16. Feederism.

17. Pinching.

18. 69. Because it’s pointless.

19. BLUEBERRY FETISHISTS. (Yes, really.)

An excerpt of our reader MissFelicia’s terrifying/amazing description:

The blueberry fetishist takes the cake though (google it!!!). I found it so bizarre, I actually roleplayed it with him via text. It started off like we were at Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory. I was Violet, and I ate the three course dinner gum. I went through the whole describing of every course, right to the blueberry end. He got crazy excited as I texted him about my skin turning blue and swelling. The belt bursting part was key to his fantasy. When I reached full size, I needed to be rolled away to be juiced, which consisted of him pretending to fuck me to orgasm. It was a very strange experience for me, but a dream come try for him. As it turns out, you can buy blue blow up suits! There’s tons of fan art of this. I never would have thought this was a fetish if I hadn’t encountered it myself.

Fascinating. So fascinating. Also a definite deal breaker for me.

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  • Kaitlin Reilly

    I can’t believe the last one could be more than one person’s fetish. Wow.

    • itpainsme2say

      never underestimate the power of a children’s movie

  • http://sarahhollowell.com/ Sarah Hollowell

    Oh my god I knew a dude who was super, super into the blueberry thing I THOUGHT HE WAS JUST WEIRD

    • Anne Marie Hawkins

      Not mutually exclusive by any means. In fact, I’m gonna go ahead and say that the Venn diagram of “people who are weird sexually” and “people who have fetishized a scene from a kids’ movie” looks like two concentric circles.

  • http://sarahhollowell.com/ Sarah Hollowell

    Also: Breastfeeding. I had a guy who tried to convince me to induce lactation and gave me a whole list of bullshit reasons why that would improve my life? And then got really angry at me when I said I wouldn’t do it. Apparently I’m “closed-minded”.

  • Naomi

    I was a pro domme for years off and on, and this list is shockingly similar to my own personal nope-list. Plus a couple others that I encountered in my personal life, like the dacryphiliac. Call me judgmental, but there’s something that deeply squicks me about a man who gets off on a woman’s tears.

  • Chad Tindale

    Hang on… I think the author of this might just not creative. Somethings I can understand. Food, Bodily fluids… I get it. Infantilism, obviously… I understand. But spankings (PUN!!!)… Hell, I get asked pretty regularly to spank my partner. And 69 is pointless? You’re doing it wrong then… And exhibitionism? That one I really don’t understand. Every girl I’ve been with seriously in the past 5 years has made a joke or had a fantasy about us being in public and putting on a show. Just saying, to each their own. I may not be cool with everything my girl suggests… but if she wants it, I’ll probably value the relationship more than my own reservations, but then let her know what things will end a sexual encounter. For me… it’s anything that makes me feel like I need a shower. Except the sweat from all the sex… you know… all the sex.

    • jade laby

      My Uncle Caleb just got red Ford Focus ST
      by working off of a computer. try this F­i­s­c­a­l­P­o­s­t­.­ℂ­o­m

    • Samantha_Escobar

      Hang on…I explained that these were all things people wrote on our last open thread. Not just random things I came up with. They’re actual answers, and people are allowed to have preferences.

    • Sexlovesounds

      They are allowed to have preferences but putting foot fetishists in a list with cannibals and necrophiliacs is cruel. We are supposed to be sex positive here. Maybe people did say that they would dump someone who wanted to kiss their feet but that doesn’t mean it is an acceptable attitude to promote. We shouldn’t shame people for their fantasies unless they are pedophilic or dangerous.

    • Samantha_Escobar

      “While fetishes and kinks are a-okay in and of themselves (provided they’re fulfilled in safe, consensual manners), each of us as an individual has the right to rule out stuff we’re not into.”
      Yeah.

      It’s actually okay to dump somebody for literally any reason. It may be sad for that person, sure, but if I’m interested in something and my partner is so disinterested in that practice that he or she wants to dump me, then that is perfectly acceptable.

    • Sexlovesounds

      But they don’t deserve to be in a list with eating people or raping children, even if some people are not ok with it.

  • MissFelicia

    I didn’t follow the other post after I commented, but I had a feeling the blueberry thing would be at the end of this list. Pretty hilarious. But I have to say, come on! Spanking? There’s a host of out-there kinks and fetishes. Breeders (yes, a sexual fetish involving impregnating a woman). Ever heard of pony play? I know a girl who acts like a pony and even gets on her hands and knees and pulls a little cart. What about furries? There’s a Pokemon fetish. All sorts of stuff. Spanking, unless to the point of welts and bruises (which some people do love), is harmless and practically vanilla.

  • Sexlovesounds

    I’d listen to Dan Savage on this one: “Dump the honest foot fetishist and you’ll end up with the dishonest necrophiliac”. Seriously?? You are going to shame someone because they are into feet? Or spanking? Or using a strap on? Would you want someone to do that to you? Dump you for revealing a benign fantasy? Send those honest benign kinksters my way. Even if you don’t want to let him rub your feet (which, why not?) treating them like they are equal to cannibals is bullshit.