• Fri, Apr 25 - 12:21 pm ET

This Woman Found The Secret to Perfect Selfies And It Only Costs $15,000

Photo: Vladimir Gjorgiev/Shutterstock

Photo: Vladimir Gjorgiev/Shutterstock

This L.A. woman takes her online selfies a bit seriously, like $15,000 worth of plastic surgery kind of seriously.

Triana Lavey, a talent agent and selfie-enthusiast in Los Angeles, recently took some drastic measures to improve her social media presence. No, she didn’t fake an engagement, and no, baby gender announcements were not involved. Instead, she got plastic surgery, a lot of it.

Lavey’s face was found wanting to the iPhone 5, so she did the logical thing and got chin and nose surgery, fat grafting, and botox injections to improve her online pics for Facebook and Skype.

Everyone loves a Facebook selfie, right? Right? Bueller?

Wait, I’m sorry, back. I just realized what I typed. She did this for Facebook and not for Instagram? That’s so 2009. Maybe even 2008.

In all fairness, Triana Lavey’s decision makes total sense. Photoshop is expensive! And Lavey only spent $15,000 to save herself the trouble of dealing with computer programming. Plus, this way she gets to look like a Bratz Doll in real-life, not just in her very classy “Mobile Uploads” album. What a deal.

Lavey has her own set of not-at-all-flawed reasoning that explains this not-at-all-unrational decision. She says that the selfie is today’s headshot, and it’s caused her to really think about her facial flaws, “Ten years ago, I don’t think I even noticed I had a week chin.” How a woman spends ten years without noticing this glaring genetic flaw is beyond me, but then again, I do study my face for imperfections every hour on the hour.

Since the (blatant!) facial defects have been fixed, Lavey can embrace that for her, as they should be for everyone, selfies are a form of self-promotion.

Selfies as self-promotion? This woman is a pioneer! Self-promoters are the best people to be around. The humble friend who posts Instagram (high-angle) selfies hourly is like that great cousin who pitches his jams and jellies startup at your brother’s wedding. Such sweethearts.

I think I’m being tough here. Selfies can be super fun. I mean, hello, Oscars.

But for Triana Levey selfies go from fun to freaking crazy. I guess we all get to pick our motto, and she’s picked hers: #nofilter.

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