10 Emotions You’ll Go Through While Swimsuit Shopping

little miss sunshine

Is there a single shopping experience that’s more fraught than swimsuit shopping? Even that adorable gif from Little Miss Sunshine gets my heart pounding because I so relate to that little girl. Let’s take a step-by-step look at the typical swimsuit shopping experience, and see if we can’t make this a little easier on ourselves.

1. Psyching yourself up.

modern family phil gif

Spend all of the spring preparing yourself for this moment. Do exercises or what have you to get a “bathing suit body,” or don’t, because literally any body in the world is a bathing suit body.

2. Calming yourself down.

benedict cumberbatch deep breath

Get yourself to the store. Take a deep breath. This isn’t going to be that bad! It’s just a piece of clothing. It doesn’t own you.

3. Start to feel some cautious excitement.

kristen wiig excited

This could be really great!

4. Experience the euphoria of grabbing tons and tons of choices.

dog shopping

It’s a numbers game. Be strategic.

5. Euphoria gives way to trepidation as you approach the fitting room.

george constanza nervous

Look, I’m sure you look great, but I understand everything that’s wrapped up in trying on swimsuits.

6. Experience abject terror.

peggy olsen scared

Okay, let’s stop right there. I promise, it’s not you. Do you know what kind of lighting dressing rooms have? Do you know how much sizes and cuts vary from brand to brand, suit to suit? Try on another one. It’s not you.

7. What’s wrong with me?

taylor swift screaming

What did we just talk about? There is literally nothing wrong with you. Try on a few more, and if they don’t work, head home and shop online. You’ll find one.

8. Resignation

michelle obama thumbs up

Okay, not bad. Hang out in it for a second.

9. Invigorated contentment

best option parks and rec

Okay, look at you go!

10. I like this, and I’ve decided to not give a flying fuck about “bathing suit bodies.”

janelle monae dgafYou’re a freaking superstar, and you look fantastic. That wasn’t so bad…right?

Gifs: Giphy

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    • Jenni

      #11 – remember you’re a vampire and you hate the sun. Make a quality Netflix queue for yourself that will carry you from Memorial Day to Labor Day.

      • http://chromachameleon.wordpress.com/ Alexis H

        This. I get frustrated by my options, then remember that I will never even wear this thing because I don’t go outside and don’t need a bathing suit anyway. It’s a bizarre ritual that I go through every couple of years.

    • Valerie

      This was hilarious. And bathing suit shopping suuuucks.