It’s High Time We Spoke Openly About Women’s Sexuality, and OMGYES Is Doing It

download (1)

(GIF: Tumblr)

I’ve never really understood the stigma surrounding talk of women’s sexuality and pleasure. In my experience, the more open you are, the more you learn and the more comfortable you are with yourself and/or your partner. But my confusion never seemed to change anything. Society at large, it seems, decided to get together without inviting me and decide that it was “inappropriate” to openly discuss what it takes for a lady to have an orgasm. Those discussions are relegated to slumber parties and female-centric websites. That is, until now.

(Related: Accidental Virgin: Please, Don’t Congratulate Me For My Virginity)

OMGYES is the result of first-of-its-kind large-scale studies to gather details on the specific techniques for women’s pleasure, run by Drs. Debby Herbenick and Brian Dodge of Indiana University. OMGYES is different because, as it states on its website,

“Sex research [until now] has been about general behaviors, like percentages of people who masturbate or use vibrators. Or the biology of what happens inside the body during sex and orgasm. But the actual techniques for women’s pleasure just hadn’t been researched before. Why? The large institutions that conduct research usually have at least a few very conservative supporters. And, for them, the specifics for women’s pleasure are still too taboo and uncomfortable to look at directly and specifically.”

OMGYES also serves to break the “Hollywood myth,” or the idea promoted by pop culture that the female orgasm is easily achieved by a few thrusts and little to no effort on anyone’s part to really understand what feels good, or what’s real and what’s manufactured by the external pressure we feel to come when our partner is done.

And when they say the research is large-scale, they aren’t kidding. The OMGYES staff interviewed over 1,000 interviews in which the participants detailed their sexual histories, how they discovered what works for them, the a-ha moments in their sexual journeys, and more.

Here’s where OMGYES comes in. They explain the role the site will play in their intro video, which you can watch here, but basically, with a subscription, you get access to all of the information gleaned over the course of all of this research. You can learn the different techniques that over 2,000 women,ages 18-95, have found increase their own pleasure, and a new technology allows you to practice and get feedback on said techniques until you’ve perfected them. Basically, it’s sex ed that actually works and encourages the idea that there’s no shame in wanting to explore your own pleasure and what works best for you.

(Related: The Gloss Gift Guide: Sex Toys for Every Naughty and Nice Person on Your List)

Season One of OMGYES, which you can get now at a special discounted holiday price for $29, includes 12 episodes full episodes, 47 short videos, and 11 “touchable” videos to help you practice the techniques you’ve learned. Essentially, the videos will serve to break down the main ways women vary in how they find pleasure and offer insights for women, men, and couples about to make sex even better. The researchers involved have plans to continue their research into sexual pleasure for a second season as well.

Personally, I’m excited about any new developments in the discussions about women’s sexuality. I took a Yes Means Yes seminar in college (we were also required to read this book, which I highly recommend), and it changed my idea of what was okay to talk about and how we should go about talking about it. During those 10 sessions, I talked about sex and sexuality with virtual strangers, and nothing opens you up more than realizing that people you don’t even know are having the same experience as you.

As women, we should be encouraging other women to discover what works best for them, and do it openly rather than behind closed doors. Once we start doing, the world is bound to start catching on. After all,

girls

(GIF: Tumblr)

OMGYES was conducted in partnership with researchers at Indiana University and the Kinsey Institute. Learn more at omgyes.com. 

Share This Post: