Don’t tell anyone I told you this, but “beauty” stories can be kind of boring sometimes. I mean, how many different ways are there to tell someone to put their hair up in a ponytail, along with step-by-step instructions no one is ever going to follow because we all know how to put our hair in ponytails already? Then again, many beauty stories are really just an excuse to look at models looking beautiful, which depending on your outlook, you either find more or less fun than learning how to capture said beauty for yourself. Case in point: in an effort to keep their May beauty story lively, Marie Claire UK enlisted fashion plate/TV presenter/”cookie cutter hipster” Alexa Chung, ostensibly to illustrate the various “beauty techniques” they recommend, but really so we could all gaze upon close-ups of her stupid sexy face. Don’t believe me? Look at how basic all of these “tips” are.