It's a Tuesday, which means it's time to scrutinize Beyonce's weight!

Photo: Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

After Beyonce and Jay Z‘s controversially epic performance at the Grammy Awards on Sunday night, it was only a matter of time before people freaked the f out. Angry parents, angry fans and Angry Angersons flooded Twitter with their imaginary memories about how the Grammys have historically been a family event, they can’t even choose to turn on the dern TV to one specific channel without Beyonce’s butt on it, yadda yadda yadda. Now that it’s been a full day since anybody called her a slut, it’s time for people to scrutinize her weight, too!

This week’s body stat speculations are brought to you by the Daily Mail! And demons.

But really: DM decided to publish an entire piece detailing what size Michael Costello, the former Project Runway designer who created Beyonce’s white and nude lace gown, believes Beyonce is. [Note: I’ve redacted the actual numbers stated because I know they can be triggering to some folks, but basically, DM and Costello just keep on…]

Her Grammys performance with husband Jay Z wasn’t the only reason that fans’ jaws dropped on Sunday night.

In fact, when Beyoncé walked the red carpet at the star-studded awards in a sheer white dress, the main focus was on just how much weight she has lost.

And now Michael Costello, who designed the white and nude gown, has revealed that the formerly bootylicious singer is now a size [redacted].

Uh, cool story bro? I thought the main focus was actually on how she wore a leather thong like two hours prior and how she looked really hot while doing it. Something along those lines, at the very least. Regardless, they continue onward:

‘It was incredible! We didn’t have any of her sizes or measurements. The dress was just made to fit a sample mannequin.

‘It’s smaller than a size [redacted]. She is tiny! That dress is at least a [redacted]. She looks amazing. I just love the way it all came together.’

Beyoncé is said to have lost an incredible [redacted] over the past six months after embarking on a vegetarian diet earlier this year before making the decision to try out the now famous 22-day vegan diet.

Question: Who cares what size she is? I’m even slightly more okay with people getting livid about her performance because at least that kind of, sort of, maybe affects you in some way, shape or form. But her dress size? Eh, not so much.

When was the last time we speculated on a man’s size for an entire article? I’m not saying we should by any means; I just can’t imagine it would ever be published because nobody’s all that interested in men’s sizes. And why would they be? Female entertainers are the ones whose careers genuinely hinge on looking a specific way 99% of the time, while males can become famous despite not being conventionally attractive provided people think they’re brilliant, hilarious, witty or just plain fascinating.

I realize that people find women’s fashion more interesting a great deal of the time–particularly when it comes to red carpets where men frequently just don tuxes–so they think it is fairer game to critique female bodies, too. However, there’s not place in the Fashion Bible (I made that up, that probably isn’t a thing and if it is, I’m a nonbeliever) that says you can’t hate or love or simply discuss a dress without simultaneously speculating on the body wearing it.