While this title is true, it my just be because I am a nuisance to my friends and family. However, the stuff really does work.

Bronze Goddess Gloss

I’m talking about Estee Lauder Bronze Beauty from Sephora, because it is a revelation. Here’s what Sephora says:

“With just one sweep, this smooth, oil-free powder gives the face, shoulders, and décolletage a seductive bronzed look. The formula contains a unique oil-control complex that keeps skin shine-free and comfortable while imparting the perfect golden glow.”

Ask my décolletage: it is feeling more beautifully bronzed than ever. The finish is natural and matte with almost no shimmer, which is exactly what I want in an everyday bronzer. If I’m feeling particularly sparkly, I’ll add a shimmery blush on top. But for contouring (temples, cheekbones, jaw line á la Kim Kardashian), this bronzer is absolutely perfect.

For shade, Medium is ideal for me. As you may notice, my face is pretty pale (this is my peak tanness) with yellow undertones. I’ve noticed that there are several comments on Sephora from very light-skinned girls who also found the Medium to be better than the Light, so if you’re pale test both Light and Medium (Walk OUT of the store. Sephora lighting gives you 0% useful information).

Okay, so here’s my regular pale, awkward face. If there’s one thing I learned from writing this, it’s that I am not a fan of having close-up pictures taken of my face, so just bear with me.

Bronzer Before

Just one note of warning: Bronze Goddess is powerful. Sometimes I’ll lose focus for a second during application and end up with an unsightly blob. The key is to start on the edges of your face near your ears and drag it in towards your lips (fish face, always fish face). Do NOT start smack in the middle of your cheek. That’s how bad things happen.

BronzerAnd my completed bronze. Behold the awkwardness:

Bronzer After

Do you like it? I’m clearly nervous