You may remember a 2009 ad of a brazen nude Jessica Rabbit, hair rippling in the wind, 7″ stilettos on her Barbie feet, and the words “bebe” below her reclining body. The ad was for bebe Eau de Parfum, a fragrance in a metal heart-shaped bottle, packaged in pink box, printed with a black ribbon and bow. Aesthetically, a little bit like Agent Provocateur’s fun-loving little sister, but not nearly as naughty or sophisticated. That’s right: Bebe Eau de Parfum.

Upon opening the bottle, I instantly thought of high school hell – notes include tuberose, jasmine, rose, and musk, aka Teen Spirit: bebe edition. There’s some mango thrown in, probably to make the fragrance impossibly youthful (and of course that note fades so quickly), but the end result is a lasting rose mixed with sandalwood. It’s powdery and slightly delightful in a girl-knows-not-what-she-does sort of way. Like unhinged hormones and a bit too much energy.

The girl who would wear this oozes a self-confidence I lacked when I was an adolescent. She probably wears booty shorts and monster platforms. I mean, I won’t mince words – it smells like a hot girl. A young hot girl. I would expect Jen in Jennifer’s Body (Megan Fox) to wear this with her heart print hoodie, rocking the Lancome juicytube lips, sans that whole demonic possession bit. And now that the Kardashian girls are at the front of bebe, I’m fairly certain the demographic just widened to include supertweens.

When asking my friend, a dude, what he thought of the scent, he responded with one phrase: “little girls in a beauty pageant.” Um, yikes!


Song: Katy Perry’s “I Kissed A Girl”

Snack: Crunch n’ Munch Caramel

Gulp: Red Bull

($49.50, available at

So, speaking of the Kardashians, Kim Kardashian just unveiled her own scent. And you know what? I’m not going to lie, I like Kim Kardashian. I don’t want to be her friend or hang out, but I find her amiable. I just feel as though she’s getting to be a lot better socialite as of late (since it is such a tiring profession). She’s finding her footing and looking more like a sophisticate. To paraphrase Nicholas Cage’s character in Peggy Sue Got Married, she’s got the hair, she’s got the teeth, she’s got the eyes.

But how does this translate to an eponymous fragrance? Well, she (or rather, perfumer Claude Dir at perfume house Givauden) chose some real knockout notes: jasmine, tuberose, gardenia, tonka bean, sandalwood. Basic crowd-pleasers. The result is a creamy fembot, Marilyn Monroe-y, mainstream women’s fragrance. This isn’t experimental, it is purely warm and sensual. Run of the mill sex bomb – it’s certainly not Chanel, but it’s not Designer Impostor either. The gardenia/tuberose concoction is one of my favorites, although oddly enough, I am convinced this would be better as a candle. And perhaps that candle is dripping wax on Ricky Martin. Just sayin.


Song: No, not L’il Flip’s “Kim Kardashian,” but rather Betty Boop’s “I Wanna Be Loved By You”

Snack: Carl’s Jr Cranberry Apple Walnut Chicken Salad

Watch: Anything Seacrest-produced at this point

(1 oz. for $35, 1.7 oz. for $50, 3.4 oz. for $65 and a 0.33-oz. rollerball for $16. at