face pierced

Do you have facial piercings? No judgement, just curious!

Every time I see a picture like this, I end up wondering three things, which possibly people who actually have facial piercings can explain.

1) Do you have to rearrange the way you do simple stuff once you get them? Like, this guy, I imagine he’s going to have to learn how to see things again. Do you have to rearrange the way you eat with a lip piercing? The way you sneeze with a nose piercing? Do you, like some sort of Jay McInerney character “have to learn everything all over again?”

2) Does it get addictive? Like, let’s say you start buying designer bags. Quickly it will not be enough to have a Kate Spade bag, you’ll want a Prada bag. Then you’ll want a Birkin. There will always seem like something cooler, dangling just out of reach. Basically, if you pierce your nose, what are the odds you’re going to want an eye fence within a year? High?

3) How dangerous and prone to infection are these? Say, if you fall on your face, will you impale yourself? Is that a crazy thought to have? Maybe. More importantly, how do you keep the pierced places clean? Because I’m pretty sure that guy’s eyebrow is infected, and almost nothing is more terrifying than an infected eyebrow. I mean, except for a lot of things. Like, an Ebola outbreak in New York would be substantially more terrifying. But in the context of “minor daily things that are off-putting.” That kind of terrifying.