One of these things is not like remotely happy like the others.

Hey everybody, Adele is still not of the same body type as almost everybody else in Hollywood! STILL. How dare she not lose weight and deny assholes the chance to then make fun of her for “looking anorexic” later on? How dare she not give into the pressures women face tenfold over men in the entertainment industry? Fortunately, Joan Rivers is here to save the day with her patently mean brand of humor!

On The Late Show with David Letterman the other night, Rivers was discussing the Academy Awards and decided that her typical spiel wasn’t getting enough laughs, so she opted to switchover to good ol’ fat shaming. Naturally, she chose Adele as the target, because nobody has ever done that and it’s not staler than sun tattoos around bellybuttons (also, equally ridiculous). Here, check it out:

Ha! Haha! She made fun of her for eating — again, how dare she? — and existing!





Naturally, everybody’s down with Jennifer Lawrence ordering McDonald’s from the red carpet (because eating fast food makes you America’s sweetheart!), but giggling about Adele theoretically eating fried chicken is totally logical. Though, speaking of J Law, did anybody else think Rivers’ crack about her being flat-chested was painfully unfunny? Like, even if you actually enjoyed making fun of people’s bodies, that one was like listening to a middle school boy attempt up with a retort when a girl won’t kiss him. Plus, it was pretty much a worldwide unanimous judgment that Lawrence looked incredible that night. And the comments about Adele…well, they were so very stupid and it was depressing to hear applause, yet I’m not surprised at all.

But, see, the problem with making fun of Adele at the Oscars is that she was amazing. Everybody acknowledged she was one of the only good things about that night. In fact, Adele is amazing pretty much all of the time, and she doesn’t seem to give a damn about what people say regarding her weight. And guess what? Neither do her fans. Neither do the endless scores of people who purchase her albums, her songs, her concert tickets.

Normally, I think the whole, “You’re just jealous!!” argument is rather silly. When it comes to Adele, though, I sometimes wonder if other celebrities are a bit envious that she arrived looking different, didn’t change her appearance body-wise and still managed to achieve enormous success. Of course, it should be like that for all women and men in the industry, but I have occasionally wondered if some of the fat shaming directed at her is the result of some folks being pissed that she didn’t have to change her appearance entirely in order to be one of the most celebrated entertainers of her time.

Regardless of the motivation, can we all just agree that calling Adele fat is old and tired and not remotely funny nor appropriate? She’s not going anywhere, so get used to seeing her face (and body), Joanie.

Photos: HRC/ and Apega/