In case any of you were unclear, Kim Kardashian is actually six months pregnant (as opposed to just letting herself go, which some people are really fretting about).
In celebration of being pregnant and herself, the Adversary decided to share the evidence–so here’s Kim Kardashian’s baby bump, naked in the breeze, free of all its past entanglements (lace, leather, breast-icicles, the worst pants in the history of the world). As for why she put this on Instagram, that speaks to a larger existential problem and one we can’t quite fathom.
This is probably the closest she’ll ever get to looking all casual, though–leggings, a high ponytail and more makeup than you’ve ever worn in your whole life. She captioned it “Baby Love.” She spelled “self” wrong.
In other news, New York Magazine points out that Kim’s old paramour (and calculated sex tape co-star) Ray J has a new song out called “I Hit It First,” and they have a selection of the lyrics:
She might move on to rappers and ballplayers,
But we all know I hit it first …
I hop in the club and boppers show love,
And I don’t even put in work …
I hit it, I hit it, I hit it, I hit it,
I hit it, I hit it first (X2)
I had her head going north and her ass going south,
But now baby chose to go West.
…Which, frankly, is the grossest.