Quick, look at these pictures next to each other and tell me what you think.

By any chance, was it, “wow, I am sick of looking at women who look like barbies; Pippa is a breath of fresh air!”

Just curious, because that’s what I thought.

Now, don’t get me wrong — Pippa Middleton is beautiful in her own right, and meets many of the standard requirements for American TV plastic beauty. The tan, the tiny waist, the shiny hair.

But Pippa retains something that the Kim Kardashians of the world have all but eradicated from the pop culture landscape. It’s a certain normalness, a certain naturalness, that Kim and her ilk inevitably, come 28 or 30, chip away at, one shot of Botox at a time.

There are a couple of sad things about this. One is that that Kim is a natural beauty, too, but now all I can see when I look at her is a face full of rat poison and tits pushed up to her chin and a layer of makeup so think you could probably drag a blade through it without puncturing the skin, and of course that unmistakable air of panic beginning to hover around her that says, oh god oh god oh god I’m getting OLD, and I’m in Hollywood.

The other sad thing is that I doubt I would have noticed all this if her picture hadn’t been juxtaposed with Pippa’s. At this point, similar images of similar plastic upon plastic upon shoved-into-dresses women are seared so permanently into my retinas that they barely register.

Thanks a lot, the media.