Hello. Here I am in the morning. I am wearing no make-up but lipstick. I am going to paint my eyes, now. I am going to pause a second while you tell me I am brave.
I know. Super fucking brave. So, some other things you could say are “why do you look so tired?” or “maybe you should stop staying up all night reading twitter for no apparent reason.” Or “you got fat fingers, ho.” Whatever, dude. Going to mask that with some great eyeshadow. Specifically, Tom Ford’s new cream eyeshadow. It’s terrific. It looks like this:
I lined up all the TFs because I am a beauty and style blogger.
In addition to the pots of metallic cream, you’re going to need a small fine brush. We’re using the Tom Ford eye shadow brush, but you can use any. You’ll also want a crease brush, like this one. And fingers. If you don’t have any fingers you are going to have so many problems. But I am proud of you for turning on the computer with your teeth, so I know you’re going to work through them. If you are one of the lucky ones with fingers, dip your pinkie finger into the pot of cream eye shadow (we are using Platinum, here).
Take about this much on your pinkie finger. Apply it directly to the center of your eyelid.
Quickly (because it can dry and harden) smudge it out towards the outer corners of your eye. If you get it in that little curve by your nose it will supposedly make you look more awake, but I think that might be lies. Once you’ve done this, take the eyeshadow brush and dip it into a slightly darker shade. We used Spice.
See? Darker. Now make a line along the crease of your eye.
Likeso. Now wipe off your pinkie finger – you will also need some wiping surface – and use it to smuge that color in, blending slightly upward. It should look like this:
You could stop there! But if you want to go on with this madcap beauty adventure, I like to use a little powder so that the cream doesn’t look quite so shiny. Matte. I think they call that “making things more mat.” The only thing to keep in mind is to use a color of powder that’s about the same as the color of cream you used. Otherwise you’d look utterly insane. I’m using this gold shade.
The white powder is also great if you want to rub a little bit right below your eyebrows. It’s another thing that’s supposed to make you look more awake! Maybe? Sure.
Use the larger crease brush and dust some powder lightly over the crease. You can add it to the eyelid or not depending upon whether you want some more pronounced sheen there. Now you’re going to want to add some cream eyeliner. Cream eyeliner almost always looks less hard than pencil or liquid eyeliner because it’s all smudgy. You can apply it with the same eyeshadow brush you used earlier. (You can rinse or just wipe off the eyeshadow on it, depending on how you feel about eyeball hygiene. I usually just spit on it, rub it off in some mud, because I’m a cowboy).
This one is also Tom Ford. It is called Noir. Buy all Tom Ford all the time, subtle endorsement at work here. No, seriously, this will work with just about any cream products, find whichever ones work for you and your budget. Carefully apply the liner, as close to your eyelashes as possible. I like to start from the outer corners and work in.
If it looks a little too raccoon eyes, you can soften it by going over it with some of the same powder you used before. Apply it with the eyeshadow brush, which again, you can rinse off if you are a non-cowboy.
You are finished, now. There is nothing more to do, ever. Why don’t you take the day off and go back to bed? AWESOME IDEA PRETTY FACE. You still got fat fingers, though.