Are you ready for pictures of  Ronald Poppo, the “cannibal” victim in Miami? Here he is before the accident:

cannibal victimAnd here he is now:

Have you now absorbed the complete horror of this? Great. Ronald Poppo is seemingly more cool with this than anyone else in the world.

Of the attack, he claimed:

“For a very short amount of time, I thought he was a good guy. But he just went and turned berserk. He apparently didn’t have a good day at the beach and he – he was coming back. And I guess he took it out, took it out on me or something. I don’t know.”

He didn’t have a good day at the beach.

By this logic, lets take away some reasons one might eat someone’s face off. I will begin.

Pictures via Buzzfeed