Thank goodness for Pinterest–it teaches us that we’ve been folding our sheets wrong and also living inferior lives by seeing that some people in the world actually alphabetize their tampons or “hack” their toilet paper to be toilet paper rosettes. While there’s a good deal of great information out there, there’s also a world of awful Pinterest tutorials. These hair tutorials are simply ridiculous, over the top, or impossible. Don’t even try.
This one doesn’t even look that great. It looks like someone didn’t center a braid.
This tutorial has ten steps and two separate sets of hands. I think it might just be easier to cut your hair off with a hacksaw.
3. Braided Heart
While this looks lovely for manic pixie kindergarten teachers, nobody on Earth is actually capable of doing this style.
4. Spiral Updo
Step 1: Grow four more hands.
If you have doll hair that stays exactly where you tell it to and a background in Boy Scouts, you should have no problem with this braid, which doubles as a way to make rope stronger should you repel off a cliff.
At this point, either rob a food bank or just buy conditioner.
This is what my hair looks like right now, and I didn’t even have to spend hours crimping my hair together. I just went outside in the humidity. Nobody believes me when I say my hair naturally looks like this, but then I share photos, and no one ever knows how to look at me after that.
8. The Bow Bun
9. Curved Lace Braid
This braid changes directions. Maybe, just maybe a person could master a complicated braid going around a side of the head that she can’t reach, but then it has to change directions? Nope.
There’s a lot wrong with this, not least of all that it’s a creepy floating mannequin. This looks like it might fit in nicely at prom in 1985, provided you had six people on hand to do your hair.
This seems like the natural evolution of the obsession with both braids and sock buns. But I ask you–why do we need both? Whatever happened to just a bun? Or a braid? It’s all just too much.