Vajazzling porn, or, as I like to think of it, “something that should have come out immediately after Jennifer Love Hewitt mentioned her bejeweled hoo-hah” is finally out. And it promises to add “bling-bling to your ding-ding.” Sometimes I want to be a pornographer just so I can rhyme non-words. I’m sort of curious whether there will be vajazzling specific plot twists in this, or if it’s just regular porn, with more sparkles. I think it would be great if say, the entire plot revolved around her trying to find men who weren’t afraid that gems would break off at inopportune moments. Because, realism.