The second day of documenting my sensible, healthy, not-a-diet eating habits made me realize something: sensible, healthy behavior is not the most gripping topic to write about. Where’s the drama? The pathos? The inner struggle? I’ll understand if you’d rather go back and read all of our Crash Diet Horror Stories instead of this post. Nevertheless, I’m going to continue to tell you about all the boring nutritious things I’ve been eating in the hopes of modeling good behavior. If you recall, I left you in nail-biting suspense yesterday over what I was going to eat for dinner.


Dinner: I end up having (surprise!) more steamed kale over quinoa with Annie’s goddess dressing, because when you’re buying groceries for one, you kind of need to use up one batch of fresh produce before you buy the next. In a wacky twist of IDGAF, I add the rest of my smoked tofu and half of a spicy seitan sausage.

Drinks: I go out to some holiday parties in my neighborhood. At the Impose Magazine party, I consume a gin collins with muddled fruit in it. It tastes like Juicy Juice and gets me kind of buzzed. The bar is way too busy to order another drink, but I think this is probably for the best. I’m too busy talking to people to spend another ten minutes staring at the lone bartender on duty, anyway. Everyone I like to talk to at parties is here! Plus my ex-boyfriend. We do not talk to each other at parties, which is sad because he’s a cool dude, but I don’t know how to fix this.

Later, at the Panache Booking party, I make myself an ill-advised drink with chocolate vodka, Kahlua, and soda water that tastes like chocolate soda in a gross-but-good kind of way. Then I help myself to a nice, big glass of sparkling rose. When I stumble and hit my head in the bathroom, I decide I’ve had enough to drink and snack on some pita chips, veggies and hummus instead of drinking more. Eating light makes me such a cheap date! I have no idea how Jennifer is not getting super wasted each night on her champagne diet.

When I get home I still have the drunk munchies, but choose to pass out instead. I realize I’m ignoring my body’s hunger cues but justify it because I know it’s just the booze talking.


Breakfast: There’s a bump on my head and I have a hangover. Normally I’d get a big, greasy breakfast sandwich but I make myself some hot 8-grain cereal with blueberries and almond milk, instead. It hits the spot, sort of. Remember I impulse-bought a Christmas tree on my way home last night. Give it some water.

Snack: A clementine and some kale chips. God, I love kale chips.

Lunch: Around 3pm, I realize I’m eating too many kale chips and I should really get off my ass and prepare an actual meal. I heat up some lentil-vegetable soup, cutting up the second half of my seitan sausage and throwing it in. People keep telling me that carbs are bad, so I eschew my usual piece of whole grain toast to see if I’m still satisfied. I am(-ish).

Now: Around 5:30, I start to get hungry for dinner. My boyfriend, whom I like to blame for all of my unhealthy lifestyle decisions, is coming over soon, at which point we will obtain and consume food (and, most likely, beer). Will his fattening presence knock me off the health wagon? Find out next time, on What I Ate Today.