It’s an ongoing 80’s movie marathon over in these parts. For the second time in a week I’m watching Heathers; and for the second time in a week I’m overly impressed at the insanely brilliant dialogue in the movie. Before this week, it had been easily a decade since the last time I saw Heathers. It had been so long that now, as an adult, I finally understand so much of what had previously gone way over my head. It was like having an epiphany; a brilliant scrunchy-filled epiphany!

If you haven’t seen Heathers, your life is severely lacking. It’s fucked up, dark and definitely cringe-worthy in a few place where you actually can’t help but ask yourself: “Um, is that completely un-PC? Or is it that we’ve just lost our senses of humor since 1988?” It’s also a great commentary on youth in America, popularity in high school and just how easy it is to be a follower than a leader. Instead of getting into the semantics of Heathers and picking it apart for all its deeper meanings, we’re going to focus on the quotes, the near-perfect, original and hilarious quotes that sum up so much in just a few words. Now memorize this shit and start dropping it in conversations as early as tonight at dinner.


All photos: New World Pictures