Have you often thought to yourself: ‘I always think I will enjoy gumball machines more than I do?’ I do. Sure, the gumball machine seems all fun and futuristic with its round glass top (like a lightbulb, almost! A weird lightbulb!) and it’s so colorful, and full of pep, and it reminds you of childhood. And isn’t it great when the gumballs roll down the spirals? Hah! Rolling things! Fun for everyone but Sisyphus!
And then you get the actual gumball and the shell is like concrete. Probably because it’s been in that machine for a year. It’s like some sort of concrete, nightmare plaster, that shell. You think your teeth are going to crack, but you’re in it to win it now, and then, you finally bite through it, and, okay, you’ve get to the gumball meat. The gumball meat is delicious for approximately ten seconds, after which you are just sort of chewing on it, like a cow chewing cud. It’s… awful. I mean, for 50 cents more, you could have gotten a very small cupcake.
Dude, your world is about to change.
Baked by Melissa (pretty much my favorite producers of miniature cupcakes) now has a cupcake pod machine. It’s 6 feet tall, and can hold 2,000 miniature cupcakes. It is the coolest thing I have ever seen. Right now, they’re only available for party rentals, but I wish they had them in every corner bodega and Papaya King. Today, your party. Tomorrow, the world. Let’s make this thing happen. Rent it here. And then please invite me to your party, I promise I won’t talk relentlessly about hating gumballs.
Picture via Baked by Melissa