A compilation of the first chapter of every book where the narrator describes how glamorous his or her parents looked when they used to get dressed up to go out for the night.

A compilation of the first paragraph of every novel that opens with the murder of the most popular girl in school.

A compilation of every time a woman has talked about how handsome her grandfather looked in those old pictures and isn’t it a shame how nobody dances, really dances like that anymore?

A compilation of every headline this year that referred to 50 shades of anything.

A compilation of every author photo from every book that’s described as a “frothy, flirty, fun mix of” anything.

A compilation of descriptions of made-up social networks in pop culture (FaceRank, the MetaVerse, FaceUnion, YouFace), in order of how closely they resemble real current or defunct services.

A compilation of Twitter bios that begin with the phrase “act locally, think globally.”

A compilation of every time a person on the E! network has referred to a pair of pants as “a pant” or a pair of lips as “a lip” (bonus points for “a bold red lip”).

A compilation of the opening paragraph of every book that calls its protagonist “not a beautiful woman” but then goes on to describe a beautiful woman.

Suggestions welcome in the comments.

[Image via Wikimedia Commons]