Stinky: "Yeah. Appetizers. We got apps." Tommy: "He's the proprietor. He's got the lingo down." - Beautiful Girls

Stinky: “Yeah. Appetizers. We got apps.” Tommy: “He’s the proprietor. He’s got the lingo down.” – Beautiful Girls

If you’re like most of us, you’re “home” for the holiday. Or rather you’re at the place from where you came and you have the family dysfunction as proof. It’s also probably a dysfunction you’re ready to abandon as soon as the last spoonful of apple pie goes in your mouth for dessert; then you’re headed to the closest door.

The best (or worst) part about the holidays, for some, is the opportunity to escape to the nearest bar with your high school or college buddies. Personally, as I’ve addressed in the past, I don’t leave my parents’ house so as to avoid such things, but some of you thrive on it. I can confirm this by looking at my Facebook feed and watching everyone make their after Christmas dinner plans. Who’s going to be wasted tonight and reminiscing about the good old days? Only about one-hundred-thousand or so kids in their 20’s and 30’s. Yes, we’re still kids, in my mind.

But how long do you wait until you jump ship? An hour? Two? Do you stick it out until Grammy is sauced enough that she won’t remember that you left?

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Photo: Miramax Films