I know what you’re thinking: plants are a lot like a first step towards a fish, which is a first step towards a hamster, which is a first step towards a dog, which is a first step towards a child. So I understand that if you don’t want children, perhaps you’ve also talked yourself out of a plant. But let me suggest that there might be another way to look at plants…

Plants are excellent for feng shui, and for recirculating oxygen. This behooves even those of us who have already had our tubes tied. That said, even if you’re afraid that you will kill a plant — or even if you have killed a plant in the past — the good news are that plants are indeed not children, and so if one dies (God rest its soul), you can go buy another one, and no one will arrest you.

So I say, cast off your fears of plants, and get thee to the nursery!