I am so glad I can now buy “tension relief ta-tas” in Japanese vending machines. Because do you know how I like to calm down? By imagining perfectly circular human breasts shrunk down really tiny, to golf ball size, and then squeezing them, hard. That’s how everyone calms down, right? “Just be discrete if you’re using them at work?” Hah! I’m going to run around through the halls of my office tossing them at people until I hit someone in the eyeball with a rubber nipple!